POLL: Do you consider yourself depressed?

[SectOfValtiel]

For the longest time I didnt believe it was depression, just thought I was sad and lonely- there was a disconnect for me growing up and I believed it wasnt *really* depression if there wasnt a recorded chemical imbalance
But then I went to therapy and got diagnosed with major depressive disorder lol

I feel like shit constantly, Its almost impossible to find joy from anything, I have the constant feeling that nobody cares about me and nobody would miss me if I just went away one day
Yeah, absolutely I have depression

But no I dont think you need to have that diagnosis to want to CTB
There are plenty of aspects of this world that arent very appealing, you cant blame a single person for not wanting to participate anymore
I dont necessarily understand that perspective but I do believe its a valid one
And most certainly there are plenty of other perspectives I dont understand about CTB that are just as valid with or without depression playing a role

 

[willitpass]

i would say so. i find no joy in life, and often times feel so stuck in my own mind that it's unbearable. i feel like i have no real purpose and am just living day to day without any real accomplishments, but have no will to go through the effort to change that. i have no friends even though i am desperately lonely, and struggle to take care of my basic needs. if i am not working, i am most likely sleeping or laying in bed doing nothing because even though i may want or need to do something, i simply cannot bring myself to. all things considered, my current life isn't bad at all, albeit mundane, yet i still don't want it. it's all too much

 

[dead lightbulb]

Well...

During my freshman year of highschool through to the beginning of sophomore year, I was an over achiever. Even before then, people who knew of me knew I was a straight A's student. I got projects turned in the day they were assigned. When I started gaining weight, I decided I'd stick to a strict weight loss regime. I would excersise before and after school for up to 3 hours every day. I got a job at 15. I took my writing and art more seriously. I bought a bike to become more active and get around places. I ate fruits and vegetables like a herbivore... and ended up with an eating disorder that I rarely acknowledge. I was organized. I was clean. I would never self indulge. I had clear and concise thoughts. I felt in control of the things I could control. I was as healthy as I could be under my circumstances.

And yet I was depressed.

I suffered during my sophomore year because my mind started to fall apart. I stopped exercising. I stopped doing school work. I stopped doing everything besides the required. I quit my job, quit at things I used to enjoy. I stopped doing things that would benefit me. I had no motivation to continue doing activities I found pointless. I was convinced if I stopped doing these obligations I would find the will to kill myself. It was so tiresome and I felt terrible but I had no desire within me.

But I didn't feel depressed. And I still dont.... really. I might be considered depressed because of a few symptoms and by society's standard, but I'm not "sad". I rarely cry. I don't self harm. I'm more angry than anything.

 

[theboy]

I am aware of my depression