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Alwaysbadtime

Alwaysbadtime

Enlightened
Jun 28, 2021
1,158
I have major regret thinking about my past pets. I didn't treat them like they deserved. There was hell and horror. I had to give up my two cats and one of my dogs. I deeply regret the decision. One of my cats had severe anxiety especially about my two dogs. I ignored this for a long time. When I had to give her up she went to an owner I know isn't responsible or stable to cater to her needs. Everyday...every hour, multiple times in an hour I think of her, and my sweet dog I miss. I'm such a fuckup. They were my kids. I fucking feel so awful. It's one of the reasons I really want to escape existence. I really only hope she is dead now, not scared and hiding.

Anyone else have regret like this? Anyone currently worried about how your serious despair affects them?

In hindsight I should have euthanized her. She was a ball of nerves. Very very sweet. Or found her a very stable quiet home.

My input is: walk your dog, play with your cat. If they are not happy try and find them a good home or... Towards the end/for quite a while it wasn't fun for any of my pets. Someone on Reddit posted for their cat and got some good responses for their city, maybe that's an option. If you plan to go and you know their lives will really fucking suck afterwards really think about euthanizing them.
 
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OceanBlue

OceanBlue

Feminist
Jun 13, 2021
701
Yeah, my parents treated Nonhumans who lived with us just as bad as humans, did not even take them to the vet when they had problems.
Their end was very sad and it will forever remain one of my biggest regrets that I was not a conscious enough kid to help in any way, I made it worse.

I remember them often, really painful memories; for Nonhumans it's also best not to be born.
 
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Alwaysbadtime

Alwaysbadtime

Enlightened
Jun 28, 2021
1,158
Yeah, my parents treated Nonhumans who lived with us just as bad as humans, did not even take them to the vet when they had problems.
Their end was very sad and it will forever remain one of my biggest regrets that I was not a conscious enough kid to help in any way, I made it worse.

I remember them often, really painful memories; for Nonhumans it's also best not to be born.
I hear you. I'm really pissed and sad about it. I have blame for my parents too for previous pets. It's a pile of shit. I can't stop worrying and thinking about them. Everything. If you were a kid it's hard to really help. Thanks for your reply.
 
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Alwaysbadtime

Alwaysbadtime

Enlightened
Jun 28, 2021
1,158
I assumed when I had two pets euthanized they exited immediately. They looked like that. I hope they weren't still alive when I left the room etc. I really really want to exit. The anxiety is way too much. And the guilt and regret and worry about them currently.
 
WitheringAway

WitheringAway

Ima shake the champagne bottle...
Jun 23, 2020
404
I have similar regrets. Raised a kitten to be a beautiful queen mother of 3 gorgeous kittens. They loved me so much and would surround me on my bed all 4 when I sleep. I loved them to death but I didn't give them much attention. Kind of took them for granted. Though I had to fight my family day in n day out to keep them with me to the point where I would lock them in my room all day everyday because my mom thought they would make the house dirty with their shedding fur. They would jump out the door if I opened it to escape what felt like a prison to them. Their open litter box was in my room and you can imagine the smell no matter how hard I tried to keep it clean and odorless. But it was like honey on my heart because everything about them was precious to me. Had to give them up all 4 when I got married. There was a plan to get them back but I lost contacts with the person who took them. I miss them terribly everyday. And I should say this here and hope it gets to them somehow; my precious angels, I'm very, very sorry.. mother cat you and your gorgeous babies will always be in my heart. Love you. Hope you found a better home and a better companion.
 
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Sinai Silence

Sinai Silence

I think I'ma die alone inside my room
Jul 6, 2020
810
I get this a lot when thinking about past pets but the truth is our mental health plays on theirs too. If we're feeling down it's likely they will too.

Feeling like I neglected and mistreated my animals whilst doing the same to myself was just a given for a long time.

You've just got to take solace that an animals love for you is unconditional and not all their times were bad.

Wishing you all the best ♡
 
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alwaysSuffering

alwaysSuffering

Member
May 29, 2021
42
My dog passed away May 16th. I haven't been able to go more than 5 min without thinking of suicide since then. He passed very suddenly and very unexpectedly and was the healthiest dog imaginable. I was supposed to have many more years with him. He was my only friend. I've spent every min of every day and night with him for the last 7.5 years since I got him. I live alone. So now I am in an empty house and I hate every second of my existence. I have such extreme guilt over all the times that I was mean and short tempered with him, and all the times he wanted attention and I ignored him and wasted time doing stupid meaningless things like surfing the internet instead of spending time with him. I don't even think I deserve to die. I think I deserve to keep suffering.
 
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Alwaysbadtime

Alwaysbadtime

Enlightened
Jun 28, 2021
1,158
My dog passed away May 16th. I haven't been able to go more than 5 min without thinking of suicide since then. He passed very suddenly and very unexpectedly and was the healthiest dog imaginable. I was supposed to have many more years with him. He was my only friend. I've spent every min of every day and night with him for the last 7.5 years since I got him. I live alone. So now I am in an empty house and I hate every second of my existence. I have such extreme guilt over all the times that I was mean and short tempered with him, and all the times he wanted attention and I ignored him and wasted time doing stupid meaningless things like surfing the internet instead of spending time with him. I don't even think I deserve to die. I think I deserve to keep suffering.
Sounds fucking awful. I'm sorry to hear. What happened to him. I relate big time, but I really want to escape rather than suffer. The guilt is fucking awful. I miss them all...got fucked from an early age having to see my first cat get discarded by parent. Everything about it, the reminders constantly is too much. At least your dog isn't somewhere else, suffering worse with some stranger.
 
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alwaysSuffering

alwaysSuffering

Member
May 29, 2021
42
Sounds fucking awful. I'm sorry to hear. What happened to him.
They believe he had a heart arrhythmia. It was a totally normal dog. He was the healthiest dog I've ever seen in my life. Extremely athletic, slim, very muscular (150lb mastiff), very agile. Always running, jumping, climbing over things. The most agile dog I've ever had. He had the most athletic physique. Very powerful. He was totally fine one moment, it was a totally normal day. Then he came to me and collapsed right at my feet and was dead within 2-3 min. I tried to resuscitate him. Multiple vets have told me that it was probably an arrhythmia and that there would be no way of knowing and nothing anyone could do. They've all said that even when it happens at the vet's office, they can't revive them. My vet said it happened to her own dog last year and she was unable to revive him. It's the most traumatic thing you can imagine. Your closest loved one and only friend dying right in front of you and frantically trying to save him. There was no reason for this to happen. It's absolute bullshit and I'm tired of living in a world this cruel.
 
Alwaysbadtime

Alwaysbadtime

Enlightened
Jun 28, 2021
1,158
They believe he had a heart arrhythmia. It was a totally normal dog. He was the healthiest dog I've ever seen in my life. Extremely athletic, slim, very muscular (150lb mastiff), very agile. Always running, jumping, climbing over things. The most agile dog I've ever had. He had the most athletic physique. Very powerful. He was totally fine one moment, it was a totally normal day. Then he came to me and collapsed right at my feet and was dead within 2-3 min. I tried to resuscitate him. Multiple vets have told me that it was probably an arrhythmia and that there would be no way of knowing and nothing anyone could do. They've all said that even when it happens at the vet's office, they can't revive them. My vet said it happened to her own dog last year and she was unable to revive him. It's the most traumatic thing you can imagine. Your closest loved one and only friend dying right in front of you and frantically trying to save him. There was no reason for this to happen. It's absolute bullshit and I'm tired of living in a world this cruel.
Woah, that would be very very stressful. At least it wasn't a prolonged suffering, but I know you don't feel better or like hearing 'at least'. Big dog. They don't live as long. I kept my older dog and live with another dog. Both are 16. She does circles in the yard and in the house. I feel no love for her anymore...she's fine though. Person I live with has taken her on and loves her. I feel love and sorrow for the ones I had to give up. I will never forgive myself for things I did/didn't do.
 
alwaysSuffering

alwaysSuffering

Member
May 29, 2021
42
Edit: That was supposed to say "it was a totally normal DAY" not "dog".
 
Snake of Eden

Snake of Eden

“Ye shall be as gods..🍎 🐍”
Jun 22, 2021
2,473
I have taken care of my hispanic friend's cat Coconut the loco for a year and half since my friend moved overseas for a job opportunity. We got very close almost telepathically connected. I loved her so much but I got into a rough patch mentally and emotionally the last 3 months she was with me so I neglected her and at times pushed her away. Her owner found her a permanent home and I finally gave her up. I only regret neglecting her and I wish I given her the love she deserved and not made her feel unwanted. I know she loves and forgives me and I hope there is an afterlife where I am united with her again in better circumstance. I miss you Coco the loco <3
 
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