Story People who attempted before, how did your family react?

[Reyishere]

I always thought the way my parents reacted was very strange, unloving, and self-center.

I tried ctb without researching well i just took 24 pills of paracetamol that also helps you sleep, but i panicked because i couldn't sleep. I still regretted how i went to my sleeping mother and told her what i did. She told me to dress up quickly and on our way to the car she asked me why i did that. I told her "i thought i could finally rest". "rest from what?" "life ig". Then she went silent

This whole interaction is normal ig but it got weird when my mom called my dad and he was very furious. I could blame tbe doctors because they told my mom I might be faking it for attention. Then ofc my mom told my dad. He wanted to look through my bank purchases but i was so drowsy i couldn't think or understand anything and that made my dad even more furious. My mom told him to calm down and تعوذ من ابليس which basically means "Seek refuge from the cursed satan" . He screamed that she (me) is supposed to do that not me (him).
All of that happened via a phone call but when he finally arrived at the hospital. i still remember the way he looked at me with disgust and disappointment. He didn't say anything. Just stood there. My parents then took me out of the hospital because I "wasn't communicating well" and so I'm lying or faking it for attention. The hospital told them that it's dangerous but they did it anyways. Ig to teach me a lesson or wtv.

After lunch they took me back there and the hospital said i should stay there for 3 nights. And so me and my mom did. The therapist of the hospital told my parents that they should be nice to me ant give me some flowers but my dad told my mom "i swear to God I'm not going to do that, she should be the one who gives me flowers"


All I'm trying to say is that my parents (especially my dad) were mostly mad and angry that I did something that could harm their reputation. They didn't feel sad that something or someone could lead me to try and kill myself. That wasn't something in their minds. It was only "how could you do that to us?" not "what made you feel that?" or "what can be changed so you can feel safer?".
I'm not sure if that's normal or usual for parents to do or if mine are weird.

 

[UnrulyNightmare]

I have no experience with it, but it doesn't sound normal or healthy to me the way they reacted. I'm sorry for you!

 

[Yuri440]

When I came home from the hospital after an attempt my mam got angry and shouted why didn't I think about how she felt. Till that point, my therapist didn't believe me when I said she doesn't really care about me.

It never really changed anything for me though, my family have always been like that. Hopefully you manage to find a point where you can rest, and get the support you want <3

 

[khairan]

I always thought the way my parents reacted was very strange, unloving, and self-center.

I tried ctb without researching well i just took 24 pills of paracetamol that also helps you sleep, but i panicked because i couldn't sleep. I still regretted how i went to my sleeping mother and told her what i did. She told me to dress up quickly and on our way to the car she asked me why i did that. I told her "i thought i could finally rest". "rest from what?" "life ig". Then she went silent

This whole interaction is normal ig but it got weird when my mom called my dad and he was very furious. I could blame tbe doctors because they told my mom I might be faking it for attention. Then ofc my mom told my dad. He wanted to look through my bank purchases but i was so drowsy i couldn't think or understand anything and that made my dad even more furious. My mom told him to calm down and تعوذ من ابليس which basically means "Seek refuge from the cursed satan" . He screamed that she (me) is supposed to do that not me (him).
All of that happened via a phone call but when he finally arrived at the hospital. i still remember the way he looked at me with disgust and disappointment. He didn't say anything. Just stood there. My parents then took me out of the hospital because I "wasn't communicating well" and so I'm lying or faking it for attention. The hospital told them that it's dangerous but they did it anyways. Ig to teach me a lesson or wtv.

After lunch they took me back there and the hospital said i should stay there for 3 nights. And so me and my mom did. The therapist of the hospital told my parents that they should be nice to me ant give me some flowers but my dad told my mom "i swear to God I'm not going to do that, she should be the one who gives me flowers"


All I'm trying to say is that my parents (especially my dad) were mostly mad and angry that I did something that could harm their reputation. They didn't feel sad that something or someone could lead me to try and kill myself. That wasn't something in their minds. It was only "how could you do that to us?" not "what made you feel that?" or "what can be changed so you can feel safer?".
I'm not sure if that's normal or usual for parents to do or if mine are weird.

Biological family is nothing but the people you share DNA with. The people that has ever shown me love and care weren't relatives of mine. In fact, besides my mother which I do resent for her neglect but whom I also love, I have a terrible relationship with the rest of my relatives for the most part.

I hope you get to meet people that will open their hearts to you and treat you kindly.

 

[likelyonthespectrum]

I have no experience with it, but it doesn't sound normal or healthy to me the way they reacted. I'm sorry for you!

disagree, I think that's a very normal reaction from parents, especially immigrant parents. they come from a different time and mindset where the subject is taboo, they obviously had a hard time processing it and is a new territory for them so its understandable that their first reaction would be anger/upset. if I had to deduce, i would say the poster is from the west and their parents are immigrants who went there for a better life, and like most, they have a hard time expressing/communicating their emotions even if they do care about their children, they're also too busy to keep up with everything in the poster's life like most parents so the poster has been drifting slowly, creating a disconnect through whichever life circumstance they went through up till this point where they try to ctb. its very understandable that their first reaction is anger since their thoughts are most likely "we've given you everything, came to this country for you etc etc", they're frustrated and upset and do genuinely care which is also hinted by their question of "what can be changed so you can feel safer?". they want to try but don't know how since like i said they don't understand how it got to this point mostly because there is a very common disconnect between parents and children due to the rapid progression of technology and how isolated everyone is nowadays. sorry if I rambled, but they do care about you if you're reading this op, I don't actually know your life or situation nor can i make decisions for you but i would suggest you give living another shot if them caring means anything to you.

 

[Reyishere]

disagree, I think that's a very normal reaction from parents, especially immigrant parents. they come from a different time and mindset where the subject is taboo, they obviously had a hard time processing it and is a new territory for them so its understandable that their first reaction would be anger/upset. if I had to deduce, i would say the poster is from the west and their parents are immigrants who went there for a better life, and like most, they have a hard time expressing/communicating their emotions even if they do care about their children, they're also too busy to keep up with everything in the poster's life like most parents so the poster has been drifting slowly, creating a disconnect through whichever life circumstance they went through up till this point where they try to ctb. its very understandable that their first reaction is anger since their thoughts are most likely "we've given you everything, came to this country for you etc etc", they're frustrated and upset and do genuinely care which is also hinted by their question of "what can be changed so you can feel safer?". they want to try but don't know how since like i said they don't understand how it got to this point mostly because there is a very common disconnect between parents and children due to the rapid progression of technology and how isolated everyone is nowadays. sorry if I rambled, but they do care about you if you're reading this op, I don't actually know your life or situation nor can i make decisions for you but i would suggest you give living another shot if them caring means anything to you.

It's funny that you wrote all of that under the assumption that I live in America and my parents are immigrants.

I'm from the middle east. Me and my family are born in the same country we live in. Though I don't disagree with the fact that their reaction is considered "normal" . At least in the context of the society i live in. Here everyone is obsessed with the way other people think of them. Not to mention how religious my parents are. So in their mind they failed to teach me how to be a good Muslim and I did a sinful act (trying to kill myself). That's shameful and they think they might go to hell because they didn't rise me right.

Even though I can see where they are coming from i still think they should at least think of me as their child not just a product to show off to others or to make God proud.


Also they didn't say "what can be changed to make it safer" i wanted them to ask that but instead they said "how could you do this to us?" it's always about them

 

[wilting_flower]

They reacted terribly. if I were in your shoes I would have either run away or attempted again. I'm sorry.

 

[Reyishere]

They reacted terribly. if I were in your shoes I would have either run away or attempted again. I'm sorry.

I want to run away but i depend on them financially. They have full control over my life. I will probably attempt again especially since I found my method

 

[autumn68]

my family reacted better than most i guess? they seemed like they didn't really know what to say or do. i don't know that we've even really talked about it past them saying they're glad that it didn't work. it feels like this weird family secret that they don't want to address

 

[struggles_inc]

Religious families aren't famous for being supportive. I'm really sorry. Please think of your safety. Idk how religious your parents are, in some cases this leads to "exorcism" attempts or at least some sort of cruel punishment.

 

[Reyishere]

my family reacted better than most i guess? they seemed like they didn't really know what to say or do. i don't know that we've even really talked about it past them saying they're glad that it didn't work. it feels like this weird family secret that they don't want to address

I'm not here to tell you your parents are good people. I can't judge from one interaction, but it seems like they care but mostly confused. I kinda see why they would act like that because usually healthy minded individuals don't think about death like us so when someone who they know attempt they feel shocked like the idea of killing oneself only happens in movies or to "crazy" people not "us" normal people

Religious families aren't famous for being supportive. I'm really sorry. Please think of your safety. Idk how religious your parents are, in some cases this leads to "exorcism" attempts or at least some sort of cruel punishment.

That was around 3 years ago so don't worry no exorcism happened. They did take my devices at first and asked me to read Quran in my "free time". But that slowly improved to the better

 

[lawlietsph]

i'm so sorry this happened to you.

i did not tell anyone about my attempts. until one year later i did, and my mother's reaction was the following:
"and? what do you want me to do now?"
in a completely calm and uninterested tone.
this was the moment i realized that she truly never even liked me.

 

[Reyishere]

i'm so sorry this happened to you.

i did not tell anyone about my attempts. until one year later i did, and my mother's reaction was the following:
"and? what do you want me to do now?"
in a completely calm and uninterested tone.
this was the moment i realized that she truly never even liked me.

Oh no :(( how could she react like that! I'm so sorry we deserve better

 

[Chuunibyou]

I'm sorry this happened to you. a lot of parents can be very cruel towards their children when they express autonomy in ways the parents don't approve of. a lot of parents (consciously or not) view their children as property, something to hold ownership over, or even just an extension of themselves. so especially when their children struggle and hurt themselves, the parents perceive it as a threat or insult against themselves first and foremost, rather than a chance to feel sympathy for another human being..

my parents are certainly like that too, which is why I didn't tell them after my one serious attempt failed. though I also didn't tell anyone at all, because I knew it would only cause more trouble for me.