Venting People are so insufferable and I'm so fucking delusional I can't take it

[smpkie]

I don't understand the people around me, I swear they're trying to be extremely insufferable on purpose. I've been distancing myself from my "friends" for the past few months. I just feel better when I'm not constantly annoyed by some whiney bitch who's voice I don't want to hear.
I'm tired of constantly trying to comfort the people I know. It's exhausting and it makes me feel absolutely miserable. The people I wish would open up more don't, and those who I can't stand always come to me when they have an issue. I'm supposed to solve everyone's problems but I'm so so tired all of the time.,,., the fact that people disgust me doesn't help.

And for the people I do like, they seem to get tired of me. I know I'll always end up distancing myself from them, but it still hurts. It hurts a lot. I'm also so delusional I soothe myself by making up things in my head, things that I wish would happen. Sometimes I really end up believing my own thoughts, it's scary.

I'm not the best person, I've hurt a lot of people. I share a past with a lot of people, but remembering it soothes me. It's a bad thing, I don't wish to explain it but it's not supposed to comfort anyone. This autumn has fucked me up so hard that I can't even remember what happened this summer. I don't remember who I was before this autumn. I constantly try to impress horrible people online by showing off how mentally unstable I've become. It's not something to show off, but the second I'll close this site, I'll go back to doing that. It sparks hope that someone will love me for the things I do.

 

[Ozzyno]

I don't understand the people around me, I swear they're trying to be extremely insufferable on purpose. I've been distancing myself from my "friends" for the past few months. I just feel better when I'm not constantly annoyed by some whiney bitch who's voice I don't want to hear.
I'm tired of constantly trying to comfort the people I know. It's exhausting and it makes me feel absolutely miserable. The people I wish would open up more don't, and those who I can't stand always come to me when they have an issue. I'm supposed to solve everyone's problems but I'm so so tired all of the time.,,., the fact that people disgust me doesn't help.

And for the people I do like, they seem to get tired of me. I know I'll always end up distancing myself from them, but it still hurts. It hurts a lot. I'm also so delusional I soothe myself by making up things in my head, things that I wish would happen. Sometimes I really end up believing my own thoughts, it's scary.

I'm not the best person, I've hurt a lot of people. I share a past with a lot of people, but remembering it soothes me. It's a bad thing, I don't wish to explain it but it's not supposed to comfort anyone. This autumn has fucked me up so hard that I can't even remember what happened this summer. I don't remember who I was before this autumn. I constantly try to impress horrible people online by showing off how mentally unstable I've become. It's not something to show off, but the second I'll close this site, I'll go back to doing that. It sparks hope that someone will love me for the things I do.

Are you sure you're just not loving what you can't get and you just treat like shit anyone that tries to have a relationship with you because you take them as granted?