Venting PARTNERS: Looking for pity sex or genuine CTB partner?!

[Sideswipe]

So I have been through over 7 partners so far. Two disappeared, one wanted me just to be there, a few changed their minds and one really looked legit.

We made multiple plans and even sorted pre meds out etc. Met in person. Spoke for over 3 months.
The whole time he tried to incite sexual goings on. I declined. At the same time a friend of mine was having the same problem. Always older guys looking to have some kind of "relationship" before the grand finale..

Are they genuine suicidal? Catfishin? Sextrolling?
Why go to so much effort to turn around and say you have someone else and have had the whole time?
I didn't pull my knickers down? Was that the problem?

I have found the whole ordeal violating and embarrassing. I feel even more adamant on ctb on my own now.

Born alone, lived alone, die alone.... Has anyone else had an experience similar to this??

My heart froze over a a little more today... I'm ready to leave this confusing, painful, non important excuse of a life behind.

Roll on the lights out CODE BLUE

 

[Ghost2211]

Honestly can't say I'm surprised in the slightest.

 

[140 bpm]

Hard to say , but sounds like dude full of bs. If that's the way he's doing to get laid ... I donno it's immoral first of all, cuz he's playing with mind and trust of person, who lost faith to this world already AND weird second of all - to spend about 3 months for all that preps and talks (which I think you had a lot).
Also, keep in mind , that you never know who you can bump into , and what kind of screw is loose in other person's head. So be careful.

What's at the bottom line of that partnership btw? You still in touch ?

 

[SinisterKid]

Always was and always will be one of the risks in searching for a legitimate suicide partner.

So sorry it ended up like it has for you Side, you deserve better than that, everyone does. If you continue your search, i can only wish you better luck next time.

 

[Lorntroubles]

There is no point. You are right. Just do it alone and maybe the connections online here will be enough for you. Best to do shit alone then you get the results you are looking for. It's best to be at peace with your decision anyways. Also, shame on those predatory people of both genders who build up trust to try to make us feel smaller. A lot of us have sexual trauma and this is not the way to ctb. Had to post this makes me mad!

 

[SpaceForGrace]

Shame on those who would use our need to find some comfort and companionship in what is our last, loneliest, and most desperate act, as a way to find sexual release. It's sickening. Be careful.

 

[Girobatol]

Thats creepy. If you really want to ctb is because even sex has become unimportant. "Together we stand, divided we fall" is what I say about partners. Although there was a news of the partners who succesfully ctb in an airbnb in Scotland.

 

[Flippy]

Some arseholes trawl dating sites looking for women to get casual with. They invest enough time and effort until they think "they've caught a keeper" then the guys have their way and go back to their wife and family and start the search for their next opportunity! I'm sure even bigger arseholes would quite happily trawl sites like this for the same reason. Perhaps some view it as a unique opportunity with lots of potential. I should probably point out that some women aren't immune to the dating site example at least. I guess bastards are everywhere! Lol!

 

[The Warm Industry]

Honestly, I can understand the whole thought of "sex out of pity" in the head of a person who has reached that point, and having met someone like that, I can say that that person is definitely thinking twice; he doesn't really want ctb and is waiting for you (or him) to become a reason for both of you to stay alive. Or just want to use you and stay alive, for all I can say.

My only certainty is that he wants to stay alive somehow.

 

[drake4871]

Im not surprised, if you read through some of the threads there are unfortunately quite a few sexually frustrated peeps. Regardless, sorry to hear that and good luck

 

[Flippy]

Honestly, I can understand the whole thought of "sex out of pity" in the head of a person who has reached that point, and having met someone like that, I can say that that person is definitely thinking twice; he doesn't really want ctb and is waiting for you (or him) to become a reason for both of you to stay alive. Or just want to use you and stay alive, for all I can say.

My only certainty is that he wants to stay alive somehow.

Actually, that's maybe quite a nice way to look at it. I think the guy in @Sideswipe 's post was very likely just a sleazeball. I think there are some men and women who maybe want to meet someone who knows the ctb feeling and maybe hopes that will lead to some kind of transcendent relationship. In that respect I guess they are only human and the need to feel close to someone is fairly strong in most people and maybe trump's the ctb feels for some people. Maybe?

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

Ugh, just one more example of how sick people come here and to other forums to get their kicks from people who are hurting. Such folk inspired my new signature. Here's a poem to go along with my empathy to @Sideswipe:

So many vampires
come out to feed
on folks in need.
Remember,
they've already ctb'd
so don't kick yourself
for being nice;
you've lived right once
and they can't die twice.

 

[Sideswipe]

Thats creepy. If you really want to ctb is because even sex has become unimportant. "Together we stand, divided we fall" is what I say about partners. Although there was a news of the partners who succesfully ctb in an airbnb in Scotland.

He quoted this to me. Our plan was iff the back of this very incident

Always was and always will be one of the risks in searching for a legitimate suicide partner.

So sorry it ended up like it has for you Side, you deserve better than that, everyone does. If you continue your search, i can only wish you better luck next time.

Thank you x
Thank you everyone. I'm feeing more boosted today like I won't let him break me anymore than I already am

 

[Imustdevourthe]

So I have been through over 7 partners so far. Two disappeared, one wanted me just to be there, a few changed their minds and one really looked legit.

We made multiple plans and even sorted pre meds out etc. Met in person. Spoke for over 3 months.
The whole time he tried to incite sexual goings on. I declined. At the same time a friend of mine was having the same problem. Always older guys looking to have some kind of "relationship" before the grand finale..

Are they genuine suicidal? Catfishin? Sextrolling?
Why go to so much effort to turn around and say you have someone else and have had the whole time?
I didn't pull my knickers down? Was that the problem?

I have found the whole ordeal violating and embarrassing. I feel even more adamant on ctb on my own now.

Born alone, lived alone, die alone.... Has anyone else had an experience similar to this??

My heart froze over a a little more today... I'm ready to leave this confusing, painful, non important excuse of a life behind.

Roll on the lights out CODE BLUE

Come to Niagara Falls with me. I'm leaving tonight though...

 

[BPD Barbie]

I have had messages on here asking for sex, not even looking for partners, just wanting a quick shag. Told him to use Tinder. I was incredibly lucky that my one and only partner was genuine, sadly he couldn't wait and went the first week of January.
Sorry you've had such experiences though

 

[thatguyakira123]

Sad thing is that we as human beings have a biologial need to have sex and socialize. I hate both things to the core and still somtimes wish I had a relationship or sex or a friend. Honestly life would be better if we didn't have those needs.

People have different fetishes and I guess chattin up a person on the verge of CTB is one of them for some people. But it could be that some just want to statisfy those needs before they go. Honestly in my opinion if a person really wants to CTB, sex shouldn't matter.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

Catfishin? Sextrolling?
Why go to so much effort to turn around and say you have someone else and have had the whole time?

You answered the why with the first two questions. Yes and yes. They're sex narcissists. They are manipulative and want you to doubt yourself. It's about much more than dropping your knickers, much more than just sex. It's about power, an attempt to feed off and destroy yours. Glad you got away.

 

[R_N]

Some people have no shame. I always found thirsty men cringey.

 

[GHOST99]

Ugh! One of the reasons why I have decided not to ctb with a partner for now(maybe ever...)/am really hesitant to post in the partner thread. There are some people that are male and post that they prefer a female partner, and it is so suspicious.

I know there are people that want to die because of a lack of s/o or intimacy, so part of me thinks that if they're hoping to find some manic pixie dreamgirl to save that part of them and they live off in some weird doomed romance fantasy. I do feel bad for people that are lonely and understand lonliness, but good god it is predatory if you are looking for people in their most vulnerable moments.

 

[S1mpleme]

Didn't meet anyone in person, everyone just disappeared or changed their mind. Born alone, lived alone and die alone - that's about me. Extremely hard to find someone in real life, not only to CTB but in general.

 

[Sideswipe]

Thank you, all of you x

 

[LegaliseIt!]

Thank you, all of you x

I'm sorry this happened to you.

 

[Final Escape]

Yea this is why the partner thing is not easy. I found myself so vulnerable even if I did find one that seemed sincere. I think it might be best to avoid opposite sex partners or u might have to be very patient to find someone who's not trying to take advantage. It reminds me of looking for a roommate on Craigslist. So many guys will try for the live in fuck friend thing. The problem is there's rarely mutual attraction. It tends to be a bad situation at least for the woman. There are legit guys who don't do this though, they're just more rare.

 

[ReadyToFly]

Jeez you'd think on a site where people are at their wits end men woulD be able to have some compassion and understanding and not trying to take advantage of women or anyone who's in a state THIS vulnerable. I'm sorry you had to experience anything like this...
Also, I hope I'm not being rude by asking an off topic question... but how do you find a partner? I'm really not on here for any BS.. I just wanna CTB and want a partner.. im from NYC/North Jersey area... I just want to fly away.. ASAP... I'm tired of waiting, tired of trying I just don't even have the strength or energy anymore.

 

[Pupu]

I might be pessimistic but checking out that partner thread it just made me think there are people after sex or someone who has all the settings ready since they couldn't by themselves pay that energy/attention for preparations. Like trying to get easier way out. It propably tells more about me than men in general but it really didn't surprise at all that some act like real predators. If the need to get laid is so strong maybe they should try prostitutes or just CTB since their DNA wasn't good enough to fit their "biological need"....

Anyway I was first positively surprised by seeing thread like that but after reading it thought I'll still stick with my idea by going alone.

 

[spanishguy22]

This thread basically antagonizing every man that dares have a need for a intimate connection as a last good thing before ctb. Pretty laughable. It's not a bad thing if both are willing.
Talking on behalf of the guys posting there that just want a connection before ctb btw, obviously not talking about the predatory trash that doesn't want to ctb. This thread is putting both groups in the same basket.

People here telling men to get empathy while at the same time not giving a damn about how lonely they feel. Just lol

 

[Flightlinek]

Thank you for this thread, this really helps me understand some things. I've had a lot of potential partners suggest they were scared, nervous or outright didn't want to meet because they thought I was just looking for sex. I'm a virtually asexual person, and don't really even enjoy it, so I was completely baffled by this until I saw this thread... now it makes sense.

I'm the last person to judge, and if someone wants to have some "fun" before they go out, then more power to them... but luring someone into this kind of situation when they don't really plan to CTB themselves is really messed up. That people are so selfish is one of the (many) reasons I'm more than ready to get this done and overwith.

 

[BigBrotherGhost]

Just don't understand this, but I guess everybody has different issues. If it was just about sex i could get laid tonight, don't need help there. Would be nice to ctb with someone though.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

This thread basically antagonizing every man that dares have a need for a intimate connection as a last good thing before ctb. Pretty laughable. It's not a bad thing if both are willing.
Talking on behalf of the guys posting there that just want a connection before ctb btw, obviously not talking about the predatory trash that doesn't want to ctb. This thread is putting both groups in the same basket.

Your defense tells me that you don't empathize with women's vulnerability nor desire our safety. Your wants and needs come first. You minimize us by saying our calling out is laughable. I distrust you because you're trying to redirect my attention from known threats and manipulate my perceptions of reality through minimizing.

Women have been taught to give the benefit of the doubt to serve the other's best interest and put our own on the back burner. Your words reinforce that teaching. No thank you.

It is unfortunate that so many men are predatory, but it is a fact we women live with every time we go out, go to a bar, go on a date, sometimes even when we go home. Around the world, men can go out in public alone much more freely, without having to be vigilant about who is targeting them for assault. At best, I suspect you are unaware of your privilege as a man and that women do not share it. At worst, I suspect you want me to lower my vigilance.

If you want both groups out of the same basket, be proactive. Start a thread for decent guys who want to ctb with a partner so that you and those other guys can be heard away from this space you perceive as antagonistic.

______________________

For all, but especially those who are targeted by predators, I just posted this resource in Off Topic:

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/manipulation-tactics.31123/

 

[Sideswipe]

Jeez you'd think on a site where people are at their wits end men woulD be able to have some compassion and understanding and not trying to take advantage of women or anyone who's in a state THIS vulnerable. I'm sorry you had to experience anything like this...
Also, I hope I'm not being rude by asking an off topic question... but how do you find a partner? I'm really not on here for any BS.. I just wanna CTB and want a partner.. im from NYC/North Jersey area... I just want to fly away.. ASAP... I'm tired of waiting, tired of trying I just don't even have the strength or energy anymore.

There is a Partners Megathread, Im not very good at posting links but @SinisterKid usually hells me with that.

Your defense tells me that you don't empathize with women's vulnerability nor desire our safety. Your wants and needs come first. You minimize us by saying our calling out is laughable. I distrust you because you're trying to redirect my attention from known threats and manipulate my perceptions of reality through minimizing.

Women have been taught to give the benefit of the doubt to serve the other's best interest and put our own on the back burner. Your words reinforce that teaching. No thank you.

It is unfortunate that so many men are predatory, but it is a fact we women live with every time we go out, go to a bar, go on a date, sometimes even when we go home. Around the world, men can go out in public alone much more freely, without having to be vigilant about who is targeting them for assault. At best, I suspect you are unaware of your privilege as a man and that women do not share it. At worst, I suspect you want me to lower my vigilance.

If you want both groups out of the same basket, be proactive. Start a thread for decent guys who want to ctb with a partner so that you and those other guys can be heard away from this space you perceive as antagonistic.

______________________

For all, but especially those who are targeted by predators, I just posted this resource in Off Topic:

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/manipulation-tactics.31123/

This is an excellent post. I was going to rely to the comment myself but you have it nailed right here! Thank you so much.