
ThePainIsntSoBad
Member
- Jan 24, 2021
- 10
Longtime lurker, I've utilized all of your hard earned research from various posts over the last few months and finally have a full setup for partial hanging.
I tried it today and was relieved on how fast a person could become unconscious. I didn't get that far obviously. It was just a test, I did get as far as the lightheaded flashes feeling, like when you stand up too fast, a couple more seconds I probably would've been out. The pain of the rope was whatever, the pain isn't the scary part for me it's the "am I unconscious yet, is it happening."
I live with a lot of family, today they all were out of the house for about an hour. This is rare, I know my life will end like this, I don't see anything getting better, and didn't see why not to just get it over with and do it today. I guess the idea of "this will really work, it isn't going to be a cry for help and you waking up in a hospital" spooked me. The Klonopin I'm prescribed probably was a factor, chills me out, but it also helped with getting lower and lower to the ground with my knees, anxiety wasn't there.
Anyway, I'm in my late twenties, I've been dealing with mental issues for 7 years now. Suicide isn't legal, so I went through the merry go round of therapies, meds, and hospitalizations. I'm not progressing I'm just going in circles. I've let people do the thinking for me, suffering through the cliche positivity over and over while at the same time knowing that it's all bullshit but have no choice to agree or I'm stuck in a psych ward.
I tried it today and was relieved on how fast a person could become unconscious. I didn't get that far obviously. It was just a test, I did get as far as the lightheaded flashes feeling, like when you stand up too fast, a couple more seconds I probably would've been out. The pain of the rope was whatever, the pain isn't the scary part for me it's the "am I unconscious yet, is it happening."
I live with a lot of family, today they all were out of the house for about an hour. This is rare, I know my life will end like this, I don't see anything getting better, and didn't see why not to just get it over with and do it today. I guess the idea of "this will really work, it isn't going to be a cry for help and you waking up in a hospital" spooked me. The Klonopin I'm prescribed probably was a factor, chills me out, but it also helped with getting lower and lower to the ground with my knees, anxiety wasn't there.
Anyway, I'm in my late twenties, I've been dealing with mental issues for 7 years now. Suicide isn't legal, so I went through the merry go round of therapies, meds, and hospitalizations. I'm not progressing I'm just going in circles. I've let people do the thinking for me, suffering through the cliche positivity over and over while at the same time knowing that it's all bullshit but have no choice to agree or I'm stuck in a psych ward.