Story Partial experience from 10 minutes ago

[stunnednaddled]

I'm in such a shitty spot. I was ready to go so I took my benzos and drank but I was too inpatient to let them kick in so I decided to go for a practice run. I was in my noose, in a standing position with my knees bent. I couldn't get enough pressure so I started fucking around with positions and voila, after tilting my head back with the rope under my jaw, I suddenly passed out. What ensued what absolutely nothing until I randomly came back to consciousness somehow, and I still have no idea how. I started to panic, I couldn't see and I barely got the noose off in time. I started screaming and crying right afterwards. Why the fuck can I just not die peacefully? The beginning was so nice, then once I awoke I was fucking panicking and in more pain than before. Anyways, that's my story/vent. I'm ordering heroin off the darknet so I can make it easier, or maybe just OD, who knows yet. I just fucking wish I didn't come back, I 'd be dead by now had I not regained consciousness.

 

[NothingElseMatters]

You went blind? That sounds terrifying

 

[stunnednaddled]

You went blind? That sounds terrifying

I was completely blacked out. I seriously have no recollection of the event but I remember waking up and being completely disoriented, I couldn't see and I was panicking. If the benzos were in my system and I hyperventilated like I plan for the real deal, I definitely would be gone. This is the furthest I've ever gotten with partial and it was super calm while it was happening, it was just scary when I came back to

 

[NothingElseMatters]

I was completely blacked out. I seriously have no recollection of the event but I remember waking up and being completely disoriented, I couldn't see and I was panicking. If the benzos were in my system and I hyperventilated like I plan for the real deal, I definitely would be gone. This is the furthest I've ever gotten with partial and it was super calm while it was happening, it was just scary when I came back to

DO you regret? I've tried a few times today and the max I got was losing my grip and falling in the ground.

 

[stunnednaddled]

DO you regret? I've tried a few times today and the max I got was losing my grip and falling in the ground.

The only regret is seeing the scary side of it. I'ts gonna take up much more nerve to do it again I think. Granted this time I know positioning and I'll be on heroin and xanax

 

[Walilamdzi]

Yeah it is really frightening I can empathise with you about getting it off just in time I felt like that too..

 

[stunnednaddled]

Yeah it is really frightening I can empathise with you about getting it off just in time I felt like that too..

I remember waking up and having that feeling of being half asleep in the morning. The only difference was I felt like I was drowning then I realized what was going on