Discussion Painful suicide

[Thisiscertainlyause]

Hi, I'm pretty new here, atleast in making an account, but I've lurked here without an account in some of my darker moments before - but I can't find anything discussing this.
I Don't really want a painless death, and yet its what everyone talks about, I don't want overly severe pain, but something like holding skin close to a flame levels, piercing but not enough to scream, is this strange? At first all I wanted was a painless death but as time has gone on, I just want to hurt, despite it being contradictory to committing suicide to escape from pain in the first place. I'm curious if anyone has felt the same, similar or just has things to say about this in general!

 

[lostintheloop]

I guess most people would see wanting to die as strange and wanting it to hurt even more strange

But yeah I see a lot about wanting a peaceful death on here and I can't relate. Naturally, peaceful methods should be easier to go through with . However, as long as it's effective, i really want a painful death. I want to suffer as much as possible in my final moments

 

[Promised Heaven]

It's very fun to fantasize about a painful death until you actually attempt it. Almost every method has varying levels of discomfort and pain because it's your body fighting death.

That being said, this sounds more of distress to want to feel something, anything, more or equally than wanting to die, which I can actually emphasize with. Pain also will increase your SI and will make you back away, even if you only want a little bit. That's how my first attempt failed.

While it remains your choice, should you feel it is absolutely the decision and have thought about the permanent change, take a read at the sticky for attempts that shouldn't be done due to low success rate and high probability of pain.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

Yes, that is strange. I want a painless death and I'm in unbelievable mental agony because I can't get that. I want to die because I find suffering to be absolutely repulsive and painful to go through I want to decrease my suffering, not increase it

 

[Thisiscertainlyause]

I See, thank you all for your replies, and I do understand the issue with survival instinct, particularly with self harm, when using something like a match it's difficult to hold it long enough to do long term damage. If I were to ctb I'm not sure I'd actively try to make it painful, but just in general a want to be in pain when I die, but physically not distress or emotion, that would be awful.

 

[Noctulian]

Hi, I'm pretty new here, atleast in making an account, but I've lurked here without an account in some of my darker moments before - but I can't find anything discussing this.
I Don't really want a painless death, and yet its what everyone talks about, I don't want overly severe pain, but something like holding skin close to a flame levels, piercing but not enough to scream, is this strange? At first all I wanted was a painless death but as time has gone on, I just want to hurt, despite it being contradictory to committing suicide to escape from pain in the first place. I'm curious if anyone has felt the same, similar or just has things to say about this in general!

I guess most people would see wanting to die as strange and wanting it to hurt even more strange

But yeah I see a lot about wanting a peaceful death on here and I can't relate. Naturally, peaceful methods should be easier to go through with . However, as long as it's effective, i really want a painful death. I want to suffer as much as possible in my final moments

Do you guys believe in the afterlife, or ghosts? There are spiritual applications for painful suicide.