On being adopted

[reuenthal]

I've been lurking on this site on and off for some time now, but I've never seen anyone mentioning one of my biggest reasons for wanting to ctb: being an adopted child. Alongside being born and the death of my adopted mother, being adopted itself has been one of the worst things that ever happened to me. It has also been the source of great confusion and thought.
Despite having a family, I have never met a person whose blood is related to mine. It really is an alienating feeling. Not even sharing my family's skin color. I really feel like I am my own being.
Recently, I've been thinking about how my isolation and uninterest in most people around me is related to the lonely nature of being adopted. It is a confusing thing, because I do like being alone, it is freeing, but being alone(in my essence) sometimes can be really lonely.
Unfortunately, I am not capable of actually putting it into words, but I felt like venting, since people here might understand or, at least, read it.

 

[Worndown]

Adoption happens for many reasons, all sad.
For a good reason you were adopted by someone able to take you in and give you a good life. Likely much better.

Several I know were adopted and that does leave a hole they cannot fill.
They also looked past that. The hole was in the past, the "new" life was before them.
There are groups where you can discuss this. You are not alone.

 

[DeathSweetDeath]

Are you sure that being adopted was one of the worst things that ever happened to you? I understand it may feel that way, but have you thought about what would have happened if you hadn't been adopted? It never occurred to you that life might've been significantly worse? I say this as a person who learned about adoption as a very young child (because my father was adopted), and from that point on, I wondered why I hadn't been put up for adoption, and I prayed that it wasn't too late for that to happen, because all I wanted was to have parents or even just one parent who actually wanted a child. That could've been you, if your birth parents didn't give you the opportunity to have a family that wanted you in it. Just something to consider.