Help Note

[Lara Francis]

Would it be advisable to pin a small note maybe in an envelope on my front door before I hang myself to let the police know of my dead body..?

I obviously don't want to be found before I am dead.
Is this too risky, or a kind thought to those that find me x

 

[SinisterKid]

It is both, but not something I would do.

Has something happened Lara to bring this on?

 

[wanttodie.nz]

I don't think you should, if your still caring about other people's feelings, maybe you should hold out for awhile. Suicide is final, it will not matter who or how they find you. A note to your family would be cruel, I think.

I disagree. A note will let them know what you were thinking in the lead up to it.

 

[Lara Francis]

It is both, but not something I would do.

Has something happened Lara to bring this on?

Yes
I spent hours with a social worker doing a parenting assessment and now she has gone off sick without writing the report which was due in court 2 weeks ago.
They want to put the court date back several months so the whole assessment can be done again. The new social worker is horrible as I have met her before.
Meanwhile I have a 10 year old son counting down the days until the 20th August. I could refuse to do it again but my solicitor says it would not be in my best interest.
Ive struggled all this time. I keep to my part of the process but they just move the goal posts as they feel.
I have been so stressed and anxious as they don't even talk to me about my life.
I had to go to the gp yesterday as my thoughts were very serious due to the anxiety. I asked and have taken a cocktail of sleeping tablets, diazapam, sertaline to get me through the past 24hrs. I have metoclopramide to go with SN but was also refused SN when I tried to order it and was asked to fill out a suspicious order form!
I was unsure if I was able to make it until August and now the delay feels impossible.
Thanks for asking, I hope you are OK xx

I don't think you should, if your still caring about other people's feelings, maybe you should hold out for awhile. Suicide is final, it will not matter who or how they find you. A note to your family would be cruel, I think.

Hi.
It wouldn't be family but maybe a close friend. I'm not so bothered if it was a professional as its a hazard of their job no matter how distressing it must be x

 

[SinisterKid]

Ahh shit Lara, I am so sorry to read that. How on earth could that be allowed to happen? Surely the social worker can write a report whilst on leave?

Tell them you want another social worker as you believe this one has a agenda that could make any report they write bias. Your solicitor can do that for you and I am pretty sure they have a legal obligation to oblige.

Other than that, I just dont know what to say, its just a completely fucked up system we have these days.

 

[Lara Francis]

Ahh shit Lara, I am so sorry to read that. How on earth could that be allowed to happen? Surely the social worker can write a report whilst on leave?

Tell them you want another social worker as you believe this one has a agenda that could make any report they write bias. Your solicitor can do that for you and I am pretty sure they have a legal obligation to oblige.

Other than that, I just dont know what to say, its just a completely fucked up system we have these days.

It's a shit system and it just harms those who it's ment to be protecting.
The social worker is not coming back in the near future.
I said someone else could write up her notes but apparently her notes are in one place and she is in other!
So I said "what does that mean?"
Is she in prison?
When my boy was taken into care, this new social worker came to tell me I was expected in court in 2 hours that day so I went to get my boy from school so he would not be taken but she blocked my car in and stood in front of it whilst waiting for the police to come.
I told her to move or I would run her over and she jumped out of my way!
I know this sounds crazy but it was an extreme situation and I just wanted to protect my boy!

 

[SinisterKid]

Of course you did, a perfectly natural reaction and something I would have done in your shoes. Anyone tried to hurt my little one and I would die before I allowed that to happen.

How well does your brief know the family welfare system in this country? Because it sounds to me like you need someone in your corner who knows it very well.

 

[Lara Francis]

Any more thoughts please x

 

[Avicii]

Would it be advisable to pin a small note maybe in an envelope on my front door before I hang myself to let the police know of my dead body..?

I obviously don't want to be found before I am dead.
Is this too risky, or a kind thought to those that find me x

keep fighting this shit laura .... keep fighting it every day and every day you fight a ten year old still has mum ..... one day you will get him back .... have you watched afterlife on netflix yet ? it deals with grief of a loved one losing a partner and its real it stars ricky gervais and he puts his heart and soul into the performance .... he too his character wanted to kill himself after his wife dies of cancer .... the dog kept him holding onto his life ... needed feeding needed walking needed loving ..... as the series nears the end his character comes to realise that his wife wouldnt want to see him suffer the way he is ..... he's down at work he's down with people he's just broke but people come into his life and at the end he asks a nurse he gets to know caring for his dad who has dementia to go on a date .... little steps .....

your number one goal now is to get that ten year old back in your life on a permanent basis ..... he wants you any boy wants his mum .... he probally feels sad seeing you sad ........ FIGHT LAURA FIGHT please

one day were all going to see you in the recovery sub sect

 

[Lara Francis]

Thank you for such a kind reply @Avicii
Love to you x

 

[Soul]

Beautiful Lara, both these good gentlemen have given you excellent advice. It's dreadful that you've got a new obstacle to deal with at this point, but you should ask your lawyer to request a different social worker and also to retrieve the other one's notes from wherever they've been left.

You are loved, Lara - please wrap yourself in that and let it keep you warm and brave. (((Hugs)))

 

[k75]

I think it's a nice thought to leave some sort of warning, but it is risky because it could get found by some random curious person who will try to save you.

I guess it's a personal thing for everyone, if my family doesn't know how I feel by now, they are never going to know and for me... leaving a note is a kindness I won't indulge in.
They didn't care while I was here, why should I care how they feel about me being gone?

It's definitely a personal thing, and it's going to be different for everyone.

Like, my family doesn't really know because I'm thousands of miles away and they only know what I decide to tell them. And I've kept it from them because they care, so I feel like I should leave them some sort of explanation.

 

[LaBrava]

I'd just like to echo what Avicii said. Hang in there. Wishing you all the best. Stay strong.