Venting Not fit for this life

[korobka_s_konfetami]

I believe my current state is called "nostalgic depression" - I keep romanticizing the past and when I don't, I feel like I don't belong in this world at all. My cowardice always gets the better of me, especially when I'm supposed to present something to a single person or a group of people. This is the main reason I dropped out of the university I used to study at. I can't stop reflecting on the past, when I used to live in another town, way smaller than my current one. My friends, the time spent with my older brother who wasn't hardened by his adulthood yet, my parents who were younger and more active (my mom and dad were 30 and 32 respectively when I was born in 2001, so I'm a late child), my first experience with videogames, movies and especially TV shows, the lack of responsibilities. I may sound childish as hell, but I've always been too sentimental. Maybe I am not fit for this life after all.

 

[darkenmydoorstep]

I remember once discounting a new relationship on the basis that "it didn't have any memories". Sounds bizarre because how can anything ever have memories if you don't allow them to be made? Probably a similar thing.

 

[lnlybnny]

I don't have that particular issue with romanticising the past but I definitely get it when you say you're not fit for this life. It's one of my reasons to ctb.