Y
Yasuke
Member
- Jan 29, 2020
- 93
Yeah thanks. That really motivates me to change and not become bitter, hopeless, withdraw. So nobody can help me huh and nobody can do it for me. I get it youre the only one that can perform your own actions but don't you fucking think if I could just pull myself up by the bootstraps I just would? Therapy doesn't work for people like me capable of critical thinking and are nhillistic. Theres no help they can offer me that will change the fact that I think life is not worth living and it won't change the external circumstances crushing me. If society ever cared they would just kill people like me peacefully. I dont belong here. You want to live and have this shitty world fine but give people like me a way out that isn't bullshit.
They treat criminals and pets with better hospitality then me with lethal injection. I want to remain idle at best and do nothing. If I didn't have such inhibition, self preservation and cowardice I would just kill myself infact. No coping anymore, no trying to figure out if their is a way out, no modicum of hope in a hopeless world. I would just fucking do it right now this instance. What's the alternative? Work miserably 40 hours plus for 40 years just toiling away for crumbs of breads and circuses. People say get hobbies, better job, friend etc or whatever dumb platitudes come out of their mouths.
You really don't get it do you? The simple fact of having to work literally destroys all of that for me. Friendships don't exist not does love for me. Nothing fills the void and makes up for the pain. I come home and video games don't matter. Nothing matters if I have to toil for everything mercilessly. It's all meaningless. Even if I didn't have to work I still have to die and still life wouldn't be worth the risk of suffering. And of course the next response is why don't you just kill yourself you have that choice? I wish it was just like flipping a switch if you're self conscious. But I do have to say whats harder for me going to work every day essentially for the next 40 years for 1/3 of my life as wage slave only to die on a death bed or getting the urge for one day to kill myself ending all further suffering?
Especially given all the resistance I have towards it all. Will I just give in and accept reality like everyone else? Just deal with the pain and hardship only to cope? To me that's what a coward is if you're not content with life but do it anyway. So suicide is salvation and the only rational choice that could be made. I don't have some misguided naive sentimental sense of optimism, purpose, and meaning. Life isn't worth the struggle. I have nothing to live for, I am literally nothing and I want to be nothing in non existence so I no longer have nothing to suffer.
There's no help for the helpless. In an ideal and fair world euthanasia would be available for those two weak to carry the burden of life. In a perfect world people wouldn't be forced to exist anyways. Non existence is superior to life and it's only possible that those who have never suffered enough at an enough degree to believe life is inherently good or worth living. What other rational reason could anyone be sane enough?
They treat criminals and pets with better hospitality then me with lethal injection. I want to remain idle at best and do nothing. If I didn't have such inhibition, self preservation and cowardice I would just kill myself infact. No coping anymore, no trying to figure out if their is a way out, no modicum of hope in a hopeless world. I would just fucking do it right now this instance. What's the alternative? Work miserably 40 hours plus for 40 years just toiling away for crumbs of breads and circuses. People say get hobbies, better job, friend etc or whatever dumb platitudes come out of their mouths.
You really don't get it do you? The simple fact of having to work literally destroys all of that for me. Friendships don't exist not does love for me. Nothing fills the void and makes up for the pain. I come home and video games don't matter. Nothing matters if I have to toil for everything mercilessly. It's all meaningless. Even if I didn't have to work I still have to die and still life wouldn't be worth the risk of suffering. And of course the next response is why don't you just kill yourself you have that choice? I wish it was just like flipping a switch if you're self conscious. But I do have to say whats harder for me going to work every day essentially for the next 40 years for 1/3 of my life as wage slave only to die on a death bed or getting the urge for one day to kill myself ending all further suffering?
Especially given all the resistance I have towards it all. Will I just give in and accept reality like everyone else? Just deal with the pain and hardship only to cope? To me that's what a coward is if you're not content with life but do it anyway. So suicide is salvation and the only rational choice that could be made. I don't have some misguided naive sentimental sense of optimism, purpose, and meaning. Life isn't worth the struggle. I have nothing to live for, I am literally nothing and I want to be nothing in non existence so I no longer have nothing to suffer.
There's no help for the helpless. In an ideal and fair world euthanasia would be available for those two weak to carry the burden of life. In a perfect world people wouldn't be forced to exist anyways. Non existence is superior to life and it's only possible that those who have never suffered enough at an enough degree to believe life is inherently good or worth living. What other rational reason could anyone be sane enough?