EdgeofRevival
New Member
- Jul 23, 2022
- 3
Lately, suicide has been the only thing on my mind. I do not think I deserve life, nor do I think I can magically make it better after suffering all my life and wanting to kill myself for 8 years. I have attempted suicide, and failed miserably on multiple occassion. My family does not love me, and after I told my friends about the possibility of me having BPD, they've all stopped caring. Same with the girl I've been dating. I do not have any desire to continue. Yet, for some reason, I keep putting it off. I'll create some reason as to why I should kill myself later and not now. Whenever I have attempted, I always hesitate in my method and run to the hospital to avoid further damage. It feels like it's easier for other people to die than it is for me. I'm poor, I'm mentally and chronically ill, everyone always leaves me, and my parents don't love me. So why do I keep searching for excuses?