Help New user here: what should I avoid saying/doing to avoid looking like a tourist?

[thebayleaf]

hi, am new here.

i've read the rules and faq, but i'm noticing there's a culture here that i don't really know the ins and outs of yet. i'm kinda socially inept and i'm paranoid about breaking some random unspoken rule any time i post anything.

is there anything that i should avoid saying/doing? what are the dos and don'ts of sasu?

(btw, really enjoying this place. so refreshing to talk to people who aren't annoying puritans on suicide after years of hanging out on r/suicidewatch)

 

[darksouls]

hello and welcome to sasu

 

[Holu]

it's been forever since I've read the rules and I assume some of what I say is already in the rules but

Don't encourage suicide, this is a pro choice place. We might be suicidal, but there is no quicker way to get a warning or ban than encouraging someone

Don't spew pro life talking points unless you are willing to defend yourself and die on that hill

There are some morally questionable posts. Try not to just dogpile and attack people but be kind and understanding

Do not share your fucking info. There are discords and some other off site places, but please be very careful with them. Make sure you have a second account if you end up joining any of these.

Thats all that comes to my mind. Welcome to SaSu.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

Welcome to SS!

 

[Angst Filled Fuck Up]

Welcome. Outside of the advice given above, I would emulate me as much as possible, since I'm a paragon of virtue, netiquette, and general good behavior. Not to toot my own horn or anything.

 

[girlsrituals]

i was wondering this same exact thing lol. i haven't seen any real answers so i'm just going to pray that i don't come off as annoying. also omori icon waow

 

[TheHolySword]

You'll learn the more time you spend here. Be yourself. Don't be afraid to interact and be honest.

 

[setspiritfree]

Although I hate life has bought you here, we welcome all you guys anyway. Like others have said, you can't go wrong being yourself and don't be afraid to be honest about how you are feeling. Most of us are hurting and sometimes even on our last leg so most on here are completely understanding. I feel completely comfortable sharing my feelings on here with people I have never, and most likely, will never meet. It is kind of strange that people I have never met know my last thoughts than people I know, but at least I am not alone with my thoughts and can speak freely. It has been invaluable.

 

[R. A.]

Be aware this place is not a monolith.

On paper it's pro-right-to-die and there are a lot of kind - if hurting - souls, but there are also a lot of mouth-foaming pro-deathers. Most of the rules only exist to shield the administration and not the users, though they may accomplish the latter as a fringe benefit. See the second set of rules no one ever sees linked at the bottom of any page for a pretty obvious example of this.



Half of the members are 25 or younger.

Recognize the only thing we have in common is some degree of desire not to be alive. Don't assume everyone can, will, or should be your buddy. There have been murderous psychos on the forum

Archiving examples of violent/dangerous/creepy SaSu members

With all the talk I'm seeing of safety lately, I thought this could be a useful reminder that YES, THIS SHIT HAPPENS ON THIS SITE. New members should be able to be easily informed of this reality, and, if they choose, see the evidence. This site has rules and people break them. Some people are...

sanctioned-suicide.net

Learn how to search for things (once the function becomes available with time) because with tens of thousands of posts, there's a good chance your question has already been asked and answered in detail

Knowledge is power: make the most of "Search"

I wrote this as I have never seen a comprehensive guide to using the search function and I find it very useful. I've been interacting with more members here, some of whom are quite young, and also realised lately just how many people post in the Partners thread. This is a place where most people...

sanctioned-suicide.net

also @girlsrituals

 

[NormallyNeurotic]

it's been forever since I've read the rules and I assume some of what I say is already in the rules but

Don't encourage suicide, this is a pro choice place. We might be suicidal, but there is no quicker way to get a warning or ban than encouraging someone

Don't spew pro life talking points unless you are willing to defend yourself and die on that hill

There are some morally questionable posts. Try not to just dogpile and attack people but be kind and understanding

Do not share your fucking info. There are discords and some other off site places, but please be very careful with them. Make sure you have a second account if you end up joining any of these.

Thats all that comes to my mind. Welcome to SaSu.

Seconding all of this.

Since you're new, here is some lingo it took me a while to get the hang of:

• Pro-choice and pro-life here refer to suicide/death, not abortion.
• SI means "survival instinct," when in other spaces it means suicidal ideation. Some people still use the latter (though less so, I've seen it) so if you cannot tell the context, ask!

You will find people of all opinions here. While I'm not sure if it's a majority, chances are you'll meet more nihilists and anti-natalists here than most places on the internet.

Keep in mind that this is a space for those who are suffering. The most questionable posts are less likely to be trolls, and more likely to be jaded, isolated people. Debate is allowed to a certain extent, but I've found that if a person is very opinionated, they're less likely to be as cordial as other debate forums.

Don't worry, though. Nothing has gone too far in my experience. Mods are good at their jobs!

One last thing:
Goodbye threads have an extra layer of social rules. Telling someone to not commit suicide/CTB is frowned upon, unless that person is showing VERY clear signs of psychosis/mania/etc.

I also find it's a bit more accepted to gently encourage someone to wait if it's clear they're doing it impulsively. Things like them searching for ways to commit that second in their current vicinity, considering painful and unreliable methods like ODing in over-the-counter meds, slitting their throat, setting themselves on fire, etc.

While we support the right to die, no one should be enabled to commit in a vulnerable state that is likely to lead to disaster and/or regret. Pro-choice means you must be in the state of mind to make that choice.

 

[-Link-]

Well, I feel like an idiot. I didn't look at this thread earlier because I took the title literally, like going to a foreign country to do the thing, and... umm, yeah... I don't know... it seemed plausible at the time and I might have been half asleep still...

You'll learn the more time you spend here. Be yourself. Don't be afraid to interact and be honest.

I like this.

All the same, I'd also strongly echo @R. A. in advising wariness at all times, especially in private interactions.

People have shared a lot of good pointers in here. I expect this other thread -- A Crash Course for New Members -- should have some insights too, although I haven't exactly vetted it.