Help Need help with a therapist

[Imhopeless]

Hi just like in the title I need help with my therapist, unlike most of people here I actually want her to stay, let me explain.

I'm in therapy for over a year now and honestly it doesn't really help me but I need to stay with my therapist. I can't talk with anyone else like I'm talking with her, I can say what I want, discuss things I can't with others and most importantly I'm able to talk freely. Of course I know she's getting paid for it, she doesn't really care about me or my problems but it just feels good knowing that she at least pretends.

Now onto the problem, she told me today that we should stop our sessions, that she worked with me over my problems and now we can stop. I know that I won't be able to talk with anyone else like I did with her so I just can't let that happen. I also don't see myself begging her to not abandon me because of my pride. What should I do? I'm willing to starts sh if it means she'll keep me but I don't know if that won't put me in hospital. Please don't hate me for saying that though. I'm just really desperate.

And lastly I know that this is messed up, that I shouldn't do things like that just to have someone to talk to but believe me when I say that I'll go crazy if I loose her. I'll go back to not talking to anyone about anything and I'll drown in my own thoughts and worries.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

Sorry my ignorance, but why would a therapist abandon you when you have regular sessions and they r paid? Is there a limit of time per therapist in your country?

 

[Hvergelmir]

I know that I won't be able to talk with anyone else like I did with her so I just can't let that happen.

Tell her that. Explain that you're getting significant value out of the sessions, and that you're likely to become worse if they stop.

 

[ConfusedClouds]

I can relate to this feeling - regularly showing up but not really getting benefit or understanding from my therapist. But also I know I would not be able to speak to anyone else - too much of a jumble and nowhere to 'start' - I can't lose the hope that she might suddenly finally make sense for me - she's shown increasing understanding over time. But as its private therapy I haven't got the risk/threat of it being stopped. But I hate it when she encourages any breaks. I can't imagine how I would cope if she suggested stopping without a referral with a handover. I fell apart when I threw my toys out a few months back and stopped of my own choice for 6 weeks. It can be disheartening hearing so much negativity towards therapists on here when they can be one way of helping cope with the shitshow of ongoing life.

As @Hvergelmir says, raise exactly what you've shared with us. That even the thought of stopping is raising alarm bells for you and thoughts of 'bad' coping strategies and not trusting yourself. As a minimum she should help you with 'healthier' coping strategies but I totally get that that's not really what would feel helpful for you. Good luck!

 

[Linda]

Hi just like in the title I need help with my therapist, unlike most of people here I actually want her to stay, let me explain.

I'm in therapy for over a year now and honestly it doesn't really help me but I need to stay with my therapist. I can't talk with anyone else like I'm talking with her, I can say what I want, discuss things I can't with others and most importantly I'm able to talk freely. Of course I know she's getting paid for it, she doesn't really care about me or my problems but it just feels good knowing that she at least pretends.

Now onto the problem, she told me today that we should stop our sessions, that she worked with me over my problems and now we can stop. I know that I won't be able to talk with anyone else like I did with her so I just can't let that happen. I also don't see myself begging her to not abandon me because of my pride. What should I do? I'm willing to starts sh if it means she'll keep me but I don't know if that won't put me in hospital. Please don't hate me for saying that though. I'm just really desperate.

And lastly I know that this is messed up, that I shouldn't do things like that just to have someone to talk to but believe me when I say that I'll go crazy if I loose her. I'll go back to not talking to anyone about anything and I'll drown in my own thoughts and worries.

Why not tell her what you have just told us all here?

 

[Yuki_03]

I know that getting a new therapist is really hard, getting started again is like repeating a whole tear to get the connection you already have with her. But if she really doesn't care, maybe it's best to change.
But, yeah, try telling that you appreciate her and that it is hard to start again. Not begging, but just telling her to continue the sessions. If you feel it's not working, it's best to find another one, maybe one that has better reviews, more experience, known by others. Find another that can help you, it will be hard, but it's better than nothing. Good luck and hope this helped.