• ⚠️ UK Access Block Notice: Beginning July 1, 2025, this site will no longer be accessible from the United Kingdom. This is a voluntary decision made by the site's administrators. We were not forced or ordered to implement this block.

jawdropped123

jawdropped123

Experienced
Mar 19, 2022
219
I never had the guts to write a goodbye letter because i am unable to show my emotional side to my family and for the people who arent my family all i can do is be thankful.


The last eleven years of my life where very lonely. Even tho i had people around me i still couldnt share my thoughts, feeling and struggles.


Its very hard knowing that no one want to be around you because of your condition. Its painful being in isolation because no one can stand being around you. Its very hard being lied to by the people that is supposed to care the most about you. Its very painful that people are unkind to me when i go out without even knowing me at all.


I always take care of myself. Always. But with this condition other people assume you dont. So they are unkind to you. Even tho i have no control over it or a way to fix it. But i wish i did.


People take the relationships that they have for granted. Because a part of me wish that i had that.


I wish i was complaining about a guy that broke my heart or about the way thay i look, about the people around me or about being black in europe. Even tho these are some struggles that i have for me they are nothing compared to what ive mentioned up there.


I wish people where less judgemental and more accepting i mean maybe im asking for to much because if i was someone else i would be the one judging and assuming anyways. And in no way am i saying im a good person. Ive done and said things that wasn't nice before. And even tho those people will probably never see this...but im sorry.


Going back to my issue, i cant leave my house without people staring at me or reacting to me and im so ashamed about it that i made a decision to put a stop to this for my mental health and for other people.


The world is so beautiful and its filled with amazing people. I love nature so much its so beautiful i will miss that for sure. I love music so much its the only thing that makes me happy. Im so thankful for everyone that made me laugh.


Im truly sorry for everyone that had to deal with me especially for the past seven months. My condition is unfixable and even if its fixable im unable to live with this shame.
 
Last edited:
  • Hugs
  • Aww..
  • Like
Reactions: hendry, CelestialGoddess, Cathy Ames and 8 others
sharky

sharky

Lost
Dec 15, 2021
283
May I ask what your condition is?
You really sound like a nice, thoughtful person and I like that you acknowledge that there are things in life that you like

People will always be judgemental, society works that way sadly.
 
  • Aww..
Reactions: onlyanimalsaregood
jawdropped123

jawdropped123

Experienced
Mar 19, 2022
219
May I ask what your condition is?
You really sound like a nice, thoughtful person and I like that you acknowledge that there are things in life that you like

People will always be judgemental, society works that way sadly.
Hallo,

Sure its "tmau".
 
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
44,975
I'm sorry that things are so hopeless. This life is just so cruel and unfair. I can imagine that it must be unbearable having to live with that condition. I wish you the best.
 
  • Like
Reactions: onlyanimalsaregood and Foresight
Foresight

Foresight

Enlightened
Jun 14, 2019
1,393
Going back to my issue, i cant leave my house without people staring at me or reacting to me and im so ashamed about it that i made a decision to put a stop to this for my mental health and for other people.

The world is so beautiful and its filled with amazing people. I love nature so much its so beautiful i will miss that for sure. I love music so much its the only thing that makes me happy. Im so thankful for everyone that made me laugh.

Im truly sorry for everyone that had to deal with me especially for the past seven months. My condition is unfixable and even if its fixable im unable to live with this shame.
I know this kind of situation too well due to a deformity. I wish you the best. I hope you never stop enjoying music no matter what and you are able to spend as much time as possible in nature where peace can be found.
 
  • Like
Reactions: onlyanimalsaregood
jawdropped123

jawdropped123

Experienced
Mar 19, 2022
219
I'm sorry that things are so hopeless. This life is just so cruel and unfair. I can imagine that it must be unbearable having to live with that condition. I wish you the best.
Thank you so much
I know this kind of situation too well due to a deformity. I wish you the best. I hope you never stop enjoying music no matter what and you are able to spend as much time as possible in nature where peace can be found.
Thank you so much
 

Similar threads

sevennn
Replies
7
Views
947
Suicide Discussion
sevennn
sevennn
sillyprincessmeow
Replies
5
Views
602
Suicide Discussion
EmptyBottle
EmptyBottle
logopolis
Replies
5
Views
519
Suicide Discussion
temporal_anchorite
temporal_anchorite
L
Replies
1
Views
195
Suicide Discussion
r.m.216
R
livefastdieyoung
Replies
3
Views
288
Suicide Discussion
livefastdieyoung
livefastdieyoung