Venting Missed CTB deadline due to...

[Yaka]

I promised myself that I would not make it 6 months into this year if nothing changed - but here I am because my boyfriend said he would be here to make a change happen (he lives in another state and said he would fly over here and rent me out a house for a year, get me a car, and anything else I needed).

He promised that this change would happen and said he would be here in Feb/March but then something went wrong so he was unable to - now many months later after I pulled teeth to get an answer as to when he was actually coming or why he hasn't already he says he is too busy with two of his friends, one that was rped and another that is trying to end themselves too - I hate bringing this up to him at all but I am ready to go. I just can't deal with living like this for much longer and have had to for now just over 19 1/2 years so my whole life... he now said this time that he will be here in Nov/Dec if nothing goes wrong and now I don't know if I want to hope he goes along with this one or just leave now before I am left in this shithole empty and hurt all over again.

I would think as a GF of his I would be his priority and he knows that I am on the verge of not being around anymore but still has chosen his two friends and many businesses over my life - Am I the asshole for expecting more? I am so done I just need some outside perspective/reassurance

 

[UKscotty]

This is why setting deadlines is always recommended against. They serve no useful purpose and just cause anxiety and stress for no reason.

Once someone is ready, they are ready. The majority of people can't even commit to starting a diet tomorrow, let alone CTB X number of weeks, months etc from now.

Be gentle on yourself. When you are ready, you will CTB.

 

[Yaka]

This is why setting deadlines is always recommended against. They serve no useful purpose and just cause anxiety and stress for no reason.

Once someone is ready, they are ready. The majority of people can't even commit to starting a diet tomorrow, let alone CTB X number of weeks, months etc from now.

Be gentle on yourself. When you are ready, you will CTB.

I was going to go till he made these empty promises I am done I would go now if I could now noticing its not going to change and everyone else will alwase come before me

 

[Praestat_Mori]

"DEADlines" are there to be not met. What must change to change your decision? Can your bf change that? Can you change that with putting own effort into it?

If not, then why you would torture yourself with a "DEADline"?

Don't put too much "hope" in the true love in early ages (like 19/20" you can still find the real true love much later in life! (That's my own experience, and I'm more than double your age.)

 

[Yaka]

"DEADlines" are there to be not met. What must change to change your decision? Can your bf change that? Can you change that with putting own effort into it?

If not, then why you would torture yourself with a "DEADline"?

Don't put too much "hope" in the true love in early ages (like 19/20" you can still find the real true love much later in life! (That's my own experience, and I'm more than double your age.)

he lied about him gonna change it so no guess not - and this isnt about finding true love cause I am done nd not because of him there was more going on before he made these empty promises

 

[IWishIWasAFlower]

Your feelings are valid and you should be able to rely on your partner for support. But its easy to forget that they also are just people, with flaws and problems of themselfes. Of course i have no knowledge of you or him so i cant tell if hes just talking shit or what is going on. But i dont think it has to be an either you or his friends decision and you should not take it as such. Is the only option for you life to get better that he comes to you and sorts out housing/car etc. for you?

How has your life been the past 6 months, and what would you like to change about it?

 

[Yaka]

Your feelings are valid and you should be able to rely on your partner for support. But its easy to forget that they also are just people, with flaws and problems of themselfes. Of course i have no knowledge of you or him so i cant tell if hes just talking shit or what is going on. But i dont think it has to be an either you or his friends decision and you should not take it as such. Is the only option for you life to get better that he comes to you and sorts out housing/car etc. for you?

How has your life been the past 6 months, and what would you like to change about it?

If it dosent have to be an eather/or situation then what should be do insted hm? Cause yea he is totally in a shitty situation but damn choosing friends compleatly over a lover is not the right choice
Yes the only way for me to get out of this hell is via someones help. He offered this help - I did not ask for this from him

Been full of abuse from my own parents and sister and I'd like mum dead cause then the othe two will chill the fuck out cause its mum thats fueling them
guess I just figured going along with someones help or ending myself was better than ending someone else no matter how much they deserve the deepest pits in hell