Lara Francis

Lara Francis

Enlightened
Jun 30, 2018
1,627
When i was younger,i did not understand depresson and thought it was a word used quite flipently to describe how people felt about situations that could changed.I am not talking about life changing episodes but maybe simple things like having a bad day at work or not getting those holiday dates you wanted.

I read how many have had depresson for decades and i think u show great strength and resiliance for suffering that long.

I am in a no mans land atm.my mental health is poor but i know that the one person who will change that is being separated from me ( my son).
No matter what dr or nurses i see ,what can they do? They cant speed up the court case to bring him home.All i am told is that i need time to get better which is bullshit.I am trying to hold on and in the grand scale of his life 4 months is not a long time but it feels like forever to me.
I am so fed up with feeling the same things and the never ending pain.
I love my boy so much and want to pull through for him but death is calling and it may take hold at last and there will be no turning back.I am riddled with guilt and despair each and every day.I am mentally and emotionally tourched and there is never an escape or rest.
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
  • Aww..
Reactions: Alchemist, StillWaiting, Escaper Boy and 4 others
LaBrava

LaBrava

Experienced
May 5, 2019
265
Your son is very lucky to have a mother who loves him so much - I'm entirely estranged from mine and she never really cared. I hope you'll make it through, you're a good person.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Lara Francis and Dead Meat
T

TiredHorse

Enlightened
Nov 1, 2018
1,819
All i am told is that i need time to get better which is bullshit.
How do they expect you to get better when your son is being withheld from you? That's like telling someone they need to learn to swim before they are allowed to put their head above the surface and take a breath.

I'm so sorry, Lara. I, too, have lost all hope, and can sympathize completely. I think you have a worse situation than I do, too.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Dead Meat
Youthanasia

Youthanasia

Wanderer
Apr 18, 2019
117
I don't know the circumstances but first, best wishes to you, no one deserves to be in that sort of situation. I bet it really sucks, I hope you can come to terms with it somehow.

As someone who had his life ruined by a mentally unstable mother (and other things in addition naturally), I say if you really love your son, kick this blue out of your life and put your stuff together. You've been dealt a hand and sometimes playing along isnt a bad thing.

Of course i'm extremely biased on this but I wouldn't be enough of an asshole to just rant on you. I'm just trying to say that I've felt that in my life and seen it in others as well.

I don't think male kids have proper development being raised by single moms at all. I also don't think having parents going through emotional instability should have a the burden of raising kids. I know people have deep bonds with their children but this is easily the worst age in history to raise kids.

They will doubt you with the internet, they will likely spend too much time in the internet. To make it worse, it's a mistake to forbid internet. And then there's the countless other difficulties in their development that are peculiar to the technological era

All I'm saying is, I feel like some people see their kids as a getaway from their own lifes when it's the other way around. Kids need parents they can rely on, not to tell it's ok to lose or that you love them and that's all that matters, but to tell them that they should work harder and show them that they can also deserve other people's love.

I don't mean any disrespect or lack of sympathy here but personally I would give my absolute best and beyond for my kids, and that would be the opposite of taking part in a suicidal community. That said, again I hope you can somehow make things happen in a way you can enjoy a happy life with your family. Or whatever you choose or perceive to be a good thing.
 
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: DepressionsAHo, Antinous and Lara Francis
S

spanishguy22

Enlightened
Apr 9, 2019
1,003
When i was younger,i did not understand depresson and thought it was a word used quite flipently to describe how people felt about situations that could changed.I am not talking about life changing episodes but maybe simple things like having a bad day at work or not getting those holiday dates you wanted.

I read how many have had depresson for decades and i think u show great strength and resiliance for suffering that long.

I am in a no mans land atm.my mental health is poor but i know that the one person who will change that is being separated from me ( my son).
No matter what dr or nurses i see ,what can they do? They cant speed up the court case to bring him home.All i am told is that i need time to get better which is bullshit.I am trying to hold on and in the grand scale of his life 4 months is not a long time but it feels like forever to me.
I am so fed up with feeling the same things and the never ending pain.
I love my boy so much and want to pull through for him but death is calling and it may take hold at last and there will be no turning back.I am riddled with guilt and despair each and every day.I am mentally and emotionally tourched and there is never an escape or rest.
This so relatable...
 
Lara Francis

Lara Francis

Enlightened
Jun 30, 2018
1,627
I don't know the circumstances but first, best wishes to you, no one deserves to be in that sort of situation. I bet it really sucks, I hope you can come to terms with it somehow.

As someone who had his life ruined by a mentally unstable mother (and other things in addition naturally), I say if you really love your son, kick this blue out of your life and put your stuff together. You've been dealt a hand and sometimes playing along isnt a bad thing.

Of course i'm extremely biased on this but I wouldn't be enough of an asshole to just rant on you. I'm just trying to say that I've felt that in my life and seen it in others as well.

I don't think male kids have proper development being raised by single moms at all. I also don't think having parents going through emotional instability should have a the burden of raising kids. I know people have deep bonds with their children but this is easily the worst age in history to raise kids.

They will doubt you with the internet, they will likely spend too much time in the internet. To make it worse, it's a mistake to forbid internet. And then there's the countless other difficulties in their development that are peculiar to the technological era

All I'm saying is, I feel like some people see their kids as a getaway from their own lifes when it's the other way around. Kids need parents they can rely on, not to tell it's ok to lose or that you love them and that's all that matters, but to tell them that they should work harder and show them that they can also deserve other people's love.

I don't mean any disrespect or lack of sympathy here but personally I would give my absolute best and beyond for my kids, and that would be the opposite of taking part in a suicidal community. That said, again I hope you can somehow make things happen in a way you can enjoy a happy life with your family. Or whatever you choose or perceive to be a good thing.
Thanku for your honesty.
I wish u well x
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Alchemist
been_there

been_there

Life cares only for itself.
Jun 5, 2019
297
My heart goes out to you. Social services and family court are terrible around parents with depression. They claim to put the children first but their real priority is to protect themselves and their job. So if you admit to depression, they remove the child just in case. All you can do is try to act like you're well, whether you are or not. In my case it made no difference. I hope you do better. Your son loves and needs his only parent.
 

Similar threads

Virsus
Replies
13
Views
349
Recovery
Virsus
Virsus
Synfrome
Replies
4
Views
262
Suicide Discussion
Synfrome
Synfrome
Dr Iron Arc
Replies
11
Views
319
Offtopic
casual_existence
casual_existence
BecomingTired
Replies
0
Views
141
Suicide Discussion
BecomingTired
BecomingTired