Hi, so I'm pretty committed to CTB at this point(have an appointment with a counsellor, but they are all I have in terms of support and I don't think it'll help), getting to the point I have a few methods in mind but I'm having a hard time choosing
1. I live near a pier, its a pretty big one, and at night there is very few people around. I would need to do proper measurements but I'm fairly confident if I tied a noose to the hand rails and jumped I'd die, but I'm kind of scared of it not working, everything I've read says if your neck snaps you're dead, but I'm worried about it just causing paralysis forever. Being found is also a worry, I think it'd be pretty easy to make a fake local council sign and bring some rope to section off the end of the pier, I've done the walk recently, it takes about 30m to get to the end, and no one was that far out anyway. still this scares me alittle, but at the same time it's beautiful out there, you can see the stars really clearly and the sound of water made me feel like I could just jump when I did the walk previously.
2. Shallow water blackout, basically the same as the first but instead of a rope and jumping I'd just jump and hold my breath after hyperventilating, still scary, and there are sharks in the water occasionally, which for my purposes is probably a good thing but it just fills me with alittle dread.
3. SN, this one is the hardest to do, I live in Australia and its a regulated substance so kinda hard to get my hands on, but I like that from what I read it doesn't do alot of damage if you survive(please correct me if I'm wrong)
4. The cold, some of you may think I'm stupid considering just above I said I lived in Australia, but my idea would be to fly to somewhere cold, check local news and stuff for wild animals, find a secluded place without anything there, drink as much as I can when I'm already tired, then try to bury myself in snow, maybe body paint would also be a good idea. The hope is for the alcohol to give me a false sense of warmth, and make me more tired, making it easy to fall asleep and never wake up. My main issue is the money, I don't want to spend all I have and leave nothing for my family, its not like I have alot to leave to begin with, but it could still help.
sorry for the yap I have alot on my mind at the moment
1. I live near a pier, its a pretty big one, and at night there is very few people around. I would need to do proper measurements but I'm fairly confident if I tied a noose to the hand rails and jumped I'd die, but I'm kind of scared of it not working, everything I've read says if your neck snaps you're dead, but I'm worried about it just causing paralysis forever. Being found is also a worry, I think it'd be pretty easy to make a fake local council sign and bring some rope to section off the end of the pier, I've done the walk recently, it takes about 30m to get to the end, and no one was that far out anyway. still this scares me alittle, but at the same time it's beautiful out there, you can see the stars really clearly and the sound of water made me feel like I could just jump when I did the walk previously.
2. Shallow water blackout, basically the same as the first but instead of a rope and jumping I'd just jump and hold my breath after hyperventilating, still scary, and there are sharks in the water occasionally, which for my purposes is probably a good thing but it just fills me with alittle dread.
3. SN, this one is the hardest to do, I live in Australia and its a regulated substance so kinda hard to get my hands on, but I like that from what I read it doesn't do alot of damage if you survive(please correct me if I'm wrong)
4. The cold, some of you may think I'm stupid considering just above I said I lived in Australia, but my idea would be to fly to somewhere cold, check local news and stuff for wild animals, find a secluded place without anything there, drink as much as I can when I'm already tired, then try to bury myself in snow, maybe body paint would also be a good idea. The hope is for the alcohol to give me a false sense of warmth, and make me more tired, making it easy to fall asleep and never wake up. My main issue is the money, I don't want to spend all I have and leave nothing for my family, its not like I have alot to leave to begin with, but it could still help.
sorry for the yap I have alot on my mind at the moment
