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T

TooConscious

Enlightened
Sep 16, 2020
1,151
I have most reasons people have to commit suicide. Poor relationship, poor physical and mental health, poor financial circumstances, likely be homeless this year.
I am aware of certain things in life, my minds been expanded to know everything you can't put in to words. The different states of consciousness etc.
And people like me all enjoy their existence, an example feel they are warrior beings and just think so highly of existence and say it's nothing but love.

Where as I will not say I 'hate' it because I think that gives it meaning, it just saddens me and I don't understand why anyone loves this thing existence over none existence....
If my brain chemistry was healthy like theirs maybe I'd see different but it doesn't stop me from right now seeing how anyone can justify existence when it's half suffering.

Maybe it's like Dostoevsky wrote "perhaps he is just as fond of suffering."

All that stops me is fear and curiosity.
I know the universe (whatever you want to call it) is ME/US
Either all the astral plane type realities are just as real as this one.
Or I am the star of a major Truman show like 'fuckwithery'.
Why do very few people think existence is wrong, I can only think of Mitchell Heisman I'm sure said "no state of consciousness should be preferred to the other"
I'm on the same page as him, but I think beings should be allowed to exist if they wish as long as others aren't paying for it.
I would feel better about existence if it was clear we had the choice to exit. Not just be in the trap, forced labor camp. If I'm an eternal being going through lives and am here because of sin from the past, then I'm bored with the game and want to fix it and want out. If I chose to be here then lord something went wrong early and must've been orchestrated to.
Since 'God' makes it so clear they exist just give me a sign that we can see where we are or need to pay for sins. It seems a lot of existence is sadism. I'm curious now the energy I feel surrounding me speaking this is attacking me, wanting to communicate OR I am mentally ill and there's no 'feeling'
Hence life's a joke we're given something obscure and ridiculous, waiting for the punch line.

Stanhope sums it up inside a minute and a half.
I don't know his deep personal beliefs but I felt this video was a refreshing for anyone who thinks like me.



Good luck to you and to say cliche I hope 2021 is positive for you.
 
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