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black_iris

black_iris

hiraeth
Jan 30, 2026
21
i might have already mentioned this on here but i have wanted to ctb my entire life. Like i always knew i was going to suicide as my form of death ever since i was a little kid. And ive always thought the most romantic and beautiful thing was suiciding with your lover. like a romeo a juilette thing almost. I think i wouldnt have as much/any SI if i was doing it with someone else (someone else who was also suicidal not just suiciding with me because i want too).

And not just a friend, like an actual lover. I havent been dating at all recently but i may as well, to find someone with these same desires. but ive never met someone with the same desire as me, and i think some people prefer to do it alone.

Does anyone else feel like this too?
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: somethingisntreal and violetforever
ericharrisisgod

ericharrisisgod

NATURAL SELECTION
Dec 21, 2025
23
I feel like this but with a best friend, similarly to Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold. imagine being so close to someone you can ctb with them? sounds like heaven. A lover is a different story. But yes, duo-love ctb sounds great too.

I guess it's why some people speculated the two had a *thing*. But people just can't fathom the extent to which platonic love goes.

I want to die with my boyfriend, but he would never be up for it and would probably report me. They almost never will have the same desire.
 
violetforever

violetforever

Mage
Dec 24, 2025
570
to have someone so equally detached from earthly desires that they are willing to end it all with you would be the loveliest thing. i don't even find a chance for it to happen though. my fault for already and only loving one person to death who is very attached to earthly desires.
 

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