Venting It always gets worse

[MonochromeMind]

I came here looking for a way to die less than a month ago, and now I've seen people trying to help me start to pass away already. I didn't go out of my way to make friends, and people trying to help me end my journey, have found a way out themselves. I promised myself I wouldn't let myself care, but now people that have helped me are gone, and I genuinely feel like I'm going to lose my fucking mind more than I already have. It's like the harder I try, the worse everything is. I feel so heavy and so trapped. I'm so fucking tired and I just want out. I'm so sick of feeling and caring and trying. I can't fucking take it anymore. I've changed and I've tried, but it's all fucking meaningless, even trying to leave peacefully. I fucking hate it.

 

[weirdworld]

I'm sorry you're in pain, I find that being on this website only makes my mental state worse

 

[MonochromeMind]

I'm sorry you're in pain, I find that being on this website only makes my mental state worse

And I see you're looking for a method and failing, this world is just a fucking prison that keeps us here, without a way to leave, to torture us, and make us feel highs just to take them away and make us run towards an exit that doesn't fucking exist. I hate it so much, I hate it I hate it I hate it

 

[Deepdense]

feeling is probably the most important part of living. If you're sick of it that's just another part of living. To lose that is to live in a worse way than death.

 

[MonochromeMind]

feeling is probably the most important part of living. If you're sick of it that's just another part of living. To lose that is to live in a worse way than death.

Feeling absolutely nothing, seeing nothing, thinking nothing, shutting off my brain is better than living. Suffering is worse than nothing. Death is peace, thinking feeling and breathing is not.

 

[Deepdense]

Feeling absolutely nothing, seeing nothing, thinking nothing, shutting off my brain is better than living. Suffering is worse than nothing. Death is peace, thinking feeling and breathing is not.

I agree. But until then, this is what you have.

 

[MonochromeMind]

Everyone always fucking dies just let me join them somehow let me fucking jump off a bridge and just let it work please fucking let it work I'm so sick of this shit over and over and over I just need a way out so I stop seeing this shit
I'm sorry I'm sleep deprived and losing myself a bit
I'm going to bed goodnight

 

[weirdworld]

And I see you're looking for a method and failing, this world is just a fucking prison that keeps us here, without a way to leave, to torture us, and make us feel highs just to take them away and make us run towards an exit that doesn't fucking exist. I hate it so much, I hate it I hate it I hate it

yeah I really just wish I was never born, having to deal with the stress of dying on top of the stress of living is just too much