N

noname223

Archangel
Aug 18, 2020
5,253
Not sure where to post it. It is about suicide but mostly about suicide prevention this is why I thought recovery was the best place

My keyboard still does not work fully. Though I think this will be a long thread. Firstly I am not an expert and I don't have full knowledge on the case which I will talk about. But I read some media reports.

The first suicide which impacted me in my llife was the suicide of Robert Enke. He was a German soccer goalkeeper. I did not know much about depression or suicide at this early stage in my life. Though I can remember me and my father played the soccer game Fifa and my dad made a joke about his suicide soon after his death. My dad himself had depression and somewhat (not serious) suicidal thoughts. I think he feels superior or smarter towards people who have committed suicide. Another sign for me why I should not listen to his advices. He is quite a moron.

The wife/widow of Robert Enke explained herself soon after his suicide. I think she gave a press conference. It was really heartbreaking. However I was too young to fully grasp what has happened. I can remember one edgy youtuber made a joke about the fact Enke jumped in front of a train. This guy probably also had suicidal thoughts and depression. I was sad about the suicide but could not fully understand it.

His widow said (I try to translate it) "We thought with love we could make it!". She wanted to imply that they thought their love was strong enough to overcome his major depression. She had to admit they were wrong on that. I read Enke had appoinments with his psychiatrist the first time in 2002/2003. (He committed suicide in 2009). There was a debate in German media about his suicide. That love is not enough to prevent a suicide. Bascially the main question of this thread.
I think this is true. Love alone often does not prevent a suicide. But it can be a part of it. I don't blame his widow. They tried different things to overcome his struggle. Though probably the fact how stigmatized mental illness is in our societies contributed a lot to his suicide. He took medication in order to improve his mood. Seemingly it helped him for a while. I could not find his history of medication though.

Enke was a calm and friendly guy. I think I sympathized with him but I did not know his personal life. He and his widow were engaged in animal protection. There were some factors that led to his suicide. He always had the fear to fail at his job. He was always scared about poor performance. Moreover he was always scared that his secret becomes public. He often had to act as if everything would be fine. Seemingly he was good at hiding his pain. He did not want to go to a clinic for people with mental illlness. As I said he was anxious about his secret. Furthermore he was scared about losing the child custody for their adopted child.

I think these two factors show that the way mental illness is treated in our society led to his death. I can relate to that I was also scared to reveal my mental illness to my boss. I was later fired but my performance was also really bad. I think people who don't have much experience with depression associate the illness too often with personal weakness. Besides the fear to be punished for metal illness is cruel. It must have been an horrifc anxiety. I don't know whether this danger to lose child custody is real and under which circumstances it happens.

I think these two reasons were huge factors in his suicide

My opinion:
Love can help to overcome depression and suicidal thoughts and sometimes it is probably decisive. But usually the support has to be varied and on different levels. There are probably different variables which can help a person to live with suicidal thoughts. For example social contacts, medication, a support group, loved ones, financial support, the ability to talk openly about inner feelings without the fear of being punished, the ability to trust other people, being free of abuse or too severe performance pressure, different forms of therapy, learning to cope with suicidal thoughts, education on mental illness, being free of addiction, talking about suicidal thoughts without being judged. There are probably more but these are the ones I could name.

I think the state fails on many different levels. For example financial support for people with mental illness. Mentally ill people often get discriminated at their job without any consequences for the companies. This is an open secret that most powerful people ignore. I have experienced this way more than once. One had to change the roots for suicidal thoughts and not only treating their symptoms. I mean when I read people in this forum who are in extreme tormenting circumstances I don't wonder why the suicide rate is so high. It does not really surprise me. I am rather surprised in the other direction. How can people live despite being homeless or living for decades in poverty? I am sure could not cope with it.

That is my take on it. What is your opinion on it?
 
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necrolatry

necrolatry

Spare me a tomorrow
Oct 15, 2022
17
I think very alike. Love can be very supporting, but it alone does not suffice to prevent suicide let-alone cure ones depression. If anything, banking everything on love to make things magically better is probably foolish and I would argue you shouldn't solely rely on it. But having a partner who you can rely on, who will try to help and support you and who will give you a safe space is surely a good way to stay (or get) motivated and focus on better things. In the past it has given me something to strive for.

On the other hand, if they aren't prepared to deal with this kind of stuff it will be very hurtful to them. You might feel constantly guilty which could even worsen things.
 
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jodes2

jodes2

Hello people ❤️
Aug 28, 2022
7,737
I stick around for my girlfriend so I suppose love is a cure of sorts, though I still wish I could die
 
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Hirokami

Hirokami

Out of order
Feb 21, 2021
607
I will say, from experience, toxic relationships have only made my suicidal ideation worse. True love, as in an actually good relationship, can definitely help. It can help in a sense where you'd have a good support system.
 
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P

ph0enix

WASWAJFIWWNCJCWOAL
Oct 14, 2022
57
no love no partner and no prospect of achieving this certainly does increase SI
 
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Suicidebydeath

Suicidebydeath

No chances to be happy - dead inside
Nov 25, 2021
3,559
Yes
 
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Zegers

Zegers

Enlightened
Dec 15, 2021
1,761
Absolutely, i think a good solid family and social support can make a big difference.
 
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NoLightRemains

NoLightRemains

I found my light again. Namu Amida Butsu
Sep 26, 2021
374
I feel like in general, strong social support and love are needed to give people a chance at recovery. But this isn't true always. It doesn't fix everyone, but it gives people a fighting chance.
 
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Somebody

Somebody

The Answer is 42
Feb 16, 2021
25
It depends on the person. For me its a simple yes.
 
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assisted

assisted

🍄
Jul 7, 2022
228
i am homeless and have lived in poverty for decades. your post talks of love while your title talks of true love. i think love is not enough but true love is the best form of suicide prevention
relevant:
 
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