- Status
medicore
The man himself
- Nov 1, 2019
- 62
That's it, yeah. 40% of that bag + 50 mL of water = Methemoglobinemia-inducing ctb drink.
You said you're feeling sad. Why's that? Do you have regrets, doubts, etc?
You said you're feeling sad. Why's that? Do you have regrets, doubts, etc?
I dont want to do it but the situations I have been left with leave me no choice. I cant go on the way it is and its not in my power to change it. Its sad that I will never be with those I love again but I wont be with them by staying alive so thats why I have to go
UpandDownPrincess
Elementalist
- Dec 31, 2019
- 833
Lostnotfound-
You always have a choice. I hate to see you feeling so powerless. Ctb should be a decision you make from a place of strength, of deciding that you are in control.
Please talk to us before you do anything.
You always have a choice. I hate to see you feeling so powerless. Ctb should be a decision you make from a place of strength, of deciding that you are in control.
Please talk to us before you do anything.
I don't know. I find that I need the impulse aspect to be able to carry these things out (past attempts) and if I dont have that impulse then I dont have the nerve to do it.
I have been speaking to people on the forum and the fact is that I am powerless and that is the reason I am ctb.
gnomeboy17
Specialist
- Feb 11, 2020
- 355
I don't know what your situation is. But there probably is one way to fix it, or at least move on. Please talk about it here, someone will probably understand
Many of us been or going through a similar situation or know someone who has. Talk - maybe it might help!
I have talked and talked and talked ..... believe me!
Situation in short: adult daughter has psychological issues and makes false allegations against people all the time. This time she chose me. Because allegations there is now court orders both ways so no contact at all. I can prove my innocence but the police want to use my evidence of innocence to prosecute her for her false allegations. She would go to prison. If I dont prove my innocence I will go to prison. This is not simple, not just one allegation - it destroys my life or it destroys hers but either way it has destroyed my relationship with my family. Police will not let it drop as this is serious shit. The only option is for her to come forward and admit she lied (she has text me and told me she lied and the police want that text but I haven't surrendered it yet) and to come home and ask for help BUT she is with a lad who has fallen for all her crap (he is actually her next victim if her history is anything to go by) and is pouring on the tea and sympathy and giving her all the attention she needs to satisfy her psychological issues. So its me or her and the police have now issued orders that I have to make a probation report against her on the 17th of this month after which they will arrest her. If I dont do it they will arrest me.
No one can change this, I am totally powerless and I have no life left after this destruction. The only way to stop my pain is ctb and the only way to stop her being in so much trouble you cant believe is not to make the statements etc ie, ctb. No one can contact daughter due to court orders, and if anyone did I would be put in prison, and to be honest she hasn't got a clue what's coming as she is happy living in her deluded life with this bloke fawning all over her.
Situation in short: adult daughter has psychological issues and makes false allegations against people all the time. This time she chose me. Because allegations there is now court orders both ways so no contact at all. I can prove my innocence but the police want to use my evidence of innocence to prosecute her for her false allegations. She would go to prison. If I dont prove my innocence I will go to prison. This is not simple, not just one allegation - it destroys my life or it destroys hers but either way it has destroyed my relationship with my family. Police will not let it drop as this is serious shit. The only option is for her to come forward and admit she lied (she has text me and told me she lied and the police want that text but I haven't surrendered it yet) and to come home and ask for help BUT she is with a lad who has fallen for all her crap (he is actually her next victim if her history is anything to go by) and is pouring on the tea and sympathy and giving her all the attention she needs to satisfy her psychological issues. So its me or her and the police have now issued orders that I have to make a probation report against her on the 17th of this month after which they will arrest her. If I dont do it they will arrest me.
No one can change this, I am totally powerless and I have no life left after this destruction. The only way to stop my pain is ctb and the only way to stop her being in so much trouble you cant believe is not to make the statements etc ie, ctb. No one can contact daughter due to court orders, and if anyone did I would be put in prison, and to be honest she hasn't got a clue what's coming as she is happy living in her deluded life with this bloke fawning all over her.
Lost in a Dream
He/him - Metal head
- Feb 22, 2020
- 1,771
Damn, that is a fucked up situation to be in and I'm sorry that you are going through it. I know I might sound like an asshole when I say it, but the alternative of demonstrating your innocence might also be the right decision (rather than ctb). I know it's true that your daughter has psychological issues, but maybe she should go to prison for a little while, since she is going out of her way to destroy other people's lives when they don't massage her ego and that is totally wrong.
I understand that you want to protect her because this is your kid that we are talking about, but if you ctb now, then everyone will automatically assume that you are guilty of whatever it is you are accused of and some other poor soul will end up caught in her crosshairs. If she isn't exposed for being the liar that she is, then this is going to keep happening to other people.
Whatever decision you make is totally up to you, but I would hate to see you end your own life impulsively and make her look like she is telling the truth when she clearly isn't. Then the next time she starts falsely accusing people of things they didn't do, the police are going to trust her because they thought she was correct about the things she said about you.
She will get around 14 years? Not a little while. I think the police know I am innocent which is why they are dragging it out. In my dark days I have begged them to charge me so we can end all this shit but they cant find anything to charge me with so they just keep the case open. All of it seems irrelevant as I lose my daughter and my family whatever way this goes.
Lostandfound7
Just waiting....
- Jan 21, 2020
- 995
Ditto.
I'm so sorry to hear of this dilemma ur going thru! Def a tough decision..I agree that she needs to learn from this mistake...Don't b the martyr in this Love..it's possible that her doing the time, can b the catalyst for change..n u both can restore ur relationship..even to a much better place..Don't let this drive u to ctb my love ..
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Lost in a Dream
He/him - Metal head
- Feb 22, 2020
- 1,771
I didn't realize it would be that long. Isn't there a way that her mental health issues can be used as a defense somehow, to reduce that sentence possibly? If not, then I'm not sure what else you should do. All I know is that if I was in your situation, I would have said to lock her away and throw away the key, whether it's my daughter or not, but that way of thinking is why I'm not a parent.
If ctb is the only way out of this, then maybe it is the best thing for you to do, but I really want you to be able to make the right decision to get out of this shit show, even if that means putting your daughter in prison. I wish there was something I could do to help, but I really don't know how.
Jean4
Remember. I am ALWAYS right.... until I’m not
- Apr 28, 2019
- 7,557
You know I am with you no matter what you choose and I will support your decision. I am here if you need me. Please think about it, and don't do anything impulsive. Lots of love.
Inmyhands
Member
- Mar 6, 2020
- 37
Wasting police time, perverting the course of justice, harassment, breach of court orders, 4 counts of contempt of court (lying to the court) all adds up but without my evidence they got shit on her. She wont admit she has a psychological issue - she is blaming me, hence the me or her situation. Ive done the psychiatrist evaluation several times and have the reports which again point to her and land her even further in shit with domestic abuse charges. She has to come home, voluntarily go for help and admit her wrong so the police have no choice but to drop the investigation (both me and her refuse to co-operate and they have nothing on either of us) but she wont and there is no talking to her to get her to see the sense. I dont think she understands it all to be honest - I think she has said what she has said and continues to do what she is doing to keep her level of comfort with this bloke and thinks I will be ok and just walk away from it all and move on with a new life without her. That's about her logic but thats not reality.
I konw @Jean4 and we have talked and I appreciate it. Ive picked up the sn so I have all I need but I cant see anyway out xxYou know I am with you no matter what you choose and I will support your decision. I am here if you need me. Please think about it, and don't do anything impulsive. Lots of love.
UpandDownPrincess
Elementalist
- Dec 31, 2019
- 833
Oh, how heartbreaking.
I can't imagine what you must be going through in trying to save your daughter.
As hard as it is, perhaps she needs punishment? Even as I type this, I can't say what I would do in a similar situation.
It just seems wrong to me, somehow, to ctb as a result of someone else's issues.
Whatever you decide, I wish you peace.
I can't imagine what you must be going through in trying to save your daughter.
As hard as it is, perhaps she needs punishment? Even as I type this, I can't say what I would do in a similar situation.
It just seems wrong to me, somehow, to ctb as a result of someone else's issues.
Whatever you decide, I wish you peace.
The issue is not so much saving her or me, but that whatever I choose I dont have a relationship with her or my family as a result of all of this so I am now totally isolated. I will not have my kids in my life anymore no matter what I choose so it seems irrelevant whether I give in the evidence to get myself off or I dont. I dont want to live without my kids and in this isolation that has been created.
I'm really sad you came to this point. I know you don't want to do this. Can you give it some time at least? I'm no one to tell you what to do, but this investigation won't be forever, maybe it is worth to wait a little bit.
CuddleHug
Back, but with less enthusiasm. Hugs~
- Feb 22, 2020
- 259
I know this is not what you want to hear, but if you CTB and she can continue lying and manipulating, how many more lives do you think she will destroy? How many years before she gets caught red-handed and still end up in prison?
Your CTB won't solve anything, only extinguish your pain (and life, love and all that comes with it). And that's okay. If you want out, you are free to do so. However, your daughter has already dug her own grave and it's just a matter of time before she falls in it on her own volition.
Isn't it kinder to give her a shove to prevent her from causing even more suffering? If you can't live with that, why not both turn in the evidence and CTB? You're not doing your daughter any good by letting her off so easily...
Hope I was not too harsh. Hugs
Your CTB won't solve anything, only extinguish your pain (and life, love and all that comes with it). And that's okay. If you want out, you are free to do so. However, your daughter has already dug her own grave and it's just a matter of time before she falls in it on her own volition.
Isn't it kinder to give her a shove to prevent her from causing even more suffering? If you can't live with that, why not both turn in the evidence and CTB? You're not doing your daughter any good by letting her off so easily...
Hope I was not too harsh. Hugs
I think you're on the wrong forum buddy. This woman is obviously in a shit sittuation and you should show yourself out.
@Lostnotfound
I don't know where you are located, and obviously laws and procedures vary greatly from jurisdiction to jurisdiction. But I very seriously doubt that your daughter would get anywhere near 14 years of prison time for what you're describing. Of course I don't know nearly enough details, but I doubt she'd be doing any jail time at all. Maybe a court-ordered psych-eval, court-mandated counseling, and possibly probation.
Something tells me that you're envisioning a catastrophic worst-case scenario when the actual consequences are likely much less severe. I also don't think you fully understand the criminal justice process. The police don't have nearly as much power in this as you think (at least in my jurisdiction). Yes, they do the investigation. Then it's up to the prosecutor to bring charges. They may be able to work out an alternative resolution (pre-trial intervention, first offender programs, etc etc). If they do proceed with the charges, then there's still the option of making a plea bargain. If that doesn't happen, then the judge ultimately decides on a sentence. There's a lot of people who have the power to reduce the consequences for your daughter -- especially if she's found to be mentally ill.
Have you actually spoken to a lawyer/attorney/solicitor (or whatever they are called in your country)? Legal Aid? A victim's advocate? Have you reached out to a domestic violence organization? They are familiar with ALL aspects of this sort of stuff -- the family dynamics, psych issues, court system, criminal aspects. They usually (at least here) have legal advocates who can guide you through the whole process. Even if you are the one being (falsely) accused of domestic violence, you can still reach out to them for information.
Before you do anything else, PLEASE get some legal/professional guidance. Yes, we can try to give you emotional support, but what you really need to hear is FACTS about your and your daughter's legal situation.
Best of luck to you!
I don't know where you are located, and obviously laws and procedures vary greatly from jurisdiction to jurisdiction. But I very seriously doubt that your daughter would get anywhere near 14 years of prison time for what you're describing. Of course I don't know nearly enough details, but I doubt she'd be doing any jail time at all. Maybe a court-ordered psych-eval, court-mandated counseling, and possibly probation.
Something tells me that you're envisioning a catastrophic worst-case scenario when the actual consequences are likely much less severe. I also don't think you fully understand the criminal justice process. The police don't have nearly as much power in this as you think (at least in my jurisdiction). Yes, they do the investigation. Then it's up to the prosecutor to bring charges. They may be able to work out an alternative resolution (pre-trial intervention, first offender programs, etc etc). If they do proceed with the charges, then there's still the option of making a plea bargain. If that doesn't happen, then the judge ultimately decides on a sentence. There's a lot of people who have the power to reduce the consequences for your daughter -- especially if she's found to be mentally ill.
Have you actually spoken to a lawyer/attorney/solicitor (or whatever they are called in your country)? Legal Aid? A victim's advocate? Have you reached out to a domestic violence organization? They are familiar with ALL aspects of this sort of stuff -- the family dynamics, psych issues, court system, criminal aspects. They usually (at least here) have legal advocates who can guide you through the whole process. Even if you are the one being (falsely) accused of domestic violence, you can still reach out to them for information.
Before you do anything else, PLEASE get some legal/professional guidance. Yes, we can try to give you emotional support, but what you really need to hear is FACTS about your and your daughter's legal situation.
Best of luck to you!
Thinker
Member
- Jan 7, 2020
- 10
What are you talking about?
How can you coddle and encourage this kind of behavior, to phrase it in your own sentimental and self-righteous delusions, she is doing more harm than good just to protect her fragile emotions.
Thankyou for your reply and I understand your viewpoint. I have not coming to this point without taking lots of professional advice. I have various solicitors for various aspects of what is going on, I have legal advocates, I have spent much time with police and I have studied the laws applicable. I am aware of basis of plea, psych evaluations and sentencing guidelines. I have various domestic abuse agencies and workers involved as well as mental health and forensic experts. I have condensed the issues here as there is too much involved so the complete facts aren't here and of course I dont want to go into any details which may identify either myself or my daughter, whether I CTB or not. I do know the facts and although she wouldn't actually serve 14 years due to the justice system she would likely receive that sentence. Similar cases have been referenced. At the end of it all whatever I do I have lost my family and that is the CTB need in me. Not navigating legal systems but the loss of my family.
Thankyou for your opinion. As this is meant to be a supportive and non judgemental forum can I suggest that if you can abide by those premises that you keep your opinions to yourself.
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First...ignore the hateful nonsense. Some people react to their own pain primarily by attacking others. It's not about you at all. You were just a convenient target. One of the most helpful lessons I have learned...and embarassingly late in life...is to ignore those who insult, attack, and seek to give you their pain. I still feel the initial anger or resentment often, but I choose to say "nope" and dismiss them and while not always perfectly successful...it helps a lot and frees up energy for survival.
Second...I know how hard it is to accept at the time, but this sort of grief DOES fade and you WILL get to a place where you will think it was a bit much to give someone that much power over you. I hung on to some very toxic relationships for ten years because of what "should" be and what I "couldn't" live with or without. My life is still terrible...and those people contributed to this...but they are not the reason why I will end my life if that happens. It doesn't mean your pain is invalid. It doesn't mean you need to justify it to anyone. It just means that things aren't usually exactly what they seem like...and when we are deep in crisis we cannot or refuse to see that. Doesn't mean it gets better or time heals or whatever...it just means to work to be real about the situation. That takes time and perspective. I am of the belief people's lives are their own and would never say you are wrong or cannot opt out...just that it's a shame when people do it without a clear view.
Second...I know how hard it is to accept at the time, but this sort of grief DOES fade and you WILL get to a place where you will think it was a bit much to give someone that much power over you. I hung on to some very toxic relationships for ten years because of what "should" be and what I "couldn't" live with or without. My life is still terrible...and those people contributed to this...but they are not the reason why I will end my life if that happens. It doesn't mean your pain is invalid. It doesn't mean you need to justify it to anyone. It just means that things aren't usually exactly what they seem like...and when we are deep in crisis we cannot or refuse to see that. Doesn't mean it gets better or time heals or whatever...it just means to work to be real about the situation. That takes time and perspective. I am of the belief people's lives are their own and would never say you are wrong or cannot opt out...just that it's a shame when people do it without a clear view.
Thanks. I know I could move area, rebuild my business, rebuild friendships and have a life but at the end of it I dont want a life without the family I have worked hard to have and to raise for many years. That may be selfish as I know lots of people would want the life that I have within my grasp but money and power means nothing without those you love.
Jean4
Remember. I am ALWAYS right.... until I’m not
- Apr 28, 2019
- 7,557
You are entitled to your opinions and feelings. I know how hard everything is for you. Know you tried everything. Like I said before, I am so sorry I couldn't help you more. Your legal system is so different than mine.
Jumper Geo
Life's a bitch and then you die.
- Feb 23, 2020
- 2,910
I'm not a therapist so you probably won't agree with my thoughts and message but I wouldn't catch the bus, instead I would throw her under it, you know the right decision I think you just need a push in the right direction, you can't let her get away with hurting innocent people with lies, it will ruin many lives.
Prove your innocent, regain the family trust, forgive your daughter and support her, even when she's in prison for 14 years but to be sentenced to such a high sentence is possible in the UK but only if you accuse Politicians and the Government of a cover up and cost the tax payer millions of pounds, link below, murderers get less, in the UK you serve half your sentence with good behaviour, so there will still be time for her to live a normal life after release, your daughter doesn't sound stable, so can you imagine the physiological effect on her knowing her lies have caused her fathers death, suicide, she may ctb knowing all the pain her lies have caused, not just to you but to other innocent people.
I only presumed you were in the UK as I bought the same SN but it could be any Country I suppose, so the law could be different.
Carl Beech: 'VIP abuse' accuser jailed for 18 years
Carl Beech's lies about murder and child sexual abuse led to a £2m Metropolitan Police investigation.
www.bbc.co.uk
I really dont think I plan to do anything tonight but will do so in the next few days. I just posted saying I was sad. The SN package means I now have everything I need and its just sad.
Sad_Autistic_boy_101
When I die, you'll love me.
- Nov 19, 2019
- 453
- Status
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