If your heart's beating and you can feel it you're not dead, or in hell.
There's a chance I'll go to legitimate hell, suicide is a mortal sin in my religion.
But still, from my research there's a sliver of hope that the Lord will spare those who take their lives when clouded by illnesses, so I'm hoping I don't suffer for eternity.
That'd really suck, suffer on earth to the point where I want to take my own life to escape - then suffer eternally on the other side.
Still, as I don't have the power of Godly foresight, my plan to mitigate my suffering and put a permanent end to this shit show seems like the best idea I have.
2 smoldering barbecues in a BMW coupe, I give myself 15 mins max once those doors close.
Then...☮
