Is it stupid to have hope?

[ZoloftSüchtig]

There are moments in my life in wich I do have hope but then there are moments of immense hopelessness and I don't know wich of these is on the right. I don't know whom to believe anymore. Cause it's not that I do not want to live but I do not want to live with this immense mental pain. I did a huge mistake in life and sometimes I'm hoping I can make it right again and mostly undo that mistake but then Im wondering if it's just wishful thinking. Should I try to tell myself to finally stop having hope at all? Or is there hope for everyone of us?

 

[cheese.out]

Its absolutely not stupid to have hope and please hold on to it as long as possible. Sometimes hope is the only thing that gets me through bad times and ctb thoughts.

 

[Sweet Tart]

We live life in moments, and our perspective can change dramatically from one to the next. I think everything you feel is valid when you feel it. I'm sorry you experience so much mental pain.

 

[searchingforpeace]

I'm honestly not sure. If you have hope you must want to live.

 

[ZoloftSüchtig]

I'm honestly not sure. If you have hope you must want to live.

Yes I do want to live but only if I can undo the mistake I made as much as possible.

 

[searchingforpeace]

Then hope is a good thing.

 

[Rocinante]

I gave up on expectation of things to change

 

[ZoloftSüchtig]

I gave up on expectation of things to change

That's honestly what I'm wondering. I'm having this hope for about a year now and I'm actively fighting for this hope. For this change but it all takes so long so even if I can undo the mistake I made, is it worth it to fight for it if it costs so much energy and I just wanna sleep.

 

[020x]

Hope basically means: wanting something different to happen or to change that might seem impossible at the moment but you still look forward for it to happen.

Is it wrong? Not at all. Because that's how everyone's supposed to think to continue evolving and that's the only thing that can sometimes motivate us.

Even for the fact that hoping usually does nothing and just disappoints a person instead, but that is because something didn't happened the way we wanted and that is completely normal as well. Then it means that we lost.

Losing hope means losing your life. Hope keeps us alive. Even if we don't want to admit it, deep inside we wished for something to be better in our life. Or we hoped that we had a better life, or didn't exist at all in the first place.

 

[Arihman]

I'd say it is, if it isn't warranted. Positivity should earn its consideration just as much as negativity in order to be something more than a silly delusion, not be treated as the default, or worse be assumed as the truth even in the face of serious negativity.

That said, to each their own, if you're not determined to ctb, and thus wish to live, I supposed you might find it helpful, at least to a degree.

 

[ZoloftSüchtig]

I'd say it is, if it isn't warranted. Positivity should earn its consideration just as much as negativity in order to be something more than a silly delusion, not be treated as the default, or worse be assumed as the truth even in the face of serious negativity.

That said, to each their own, if you're not determined to ctb, and thus wish to live, I supposed you might find it helpful, at least to a degree.

Do you mean if the chance isn't 100% that is could get better than it is stupid? Like i don't know how high of a chance I have of undoing my big mistake but let's say it's like a 50% chance, I wonder If that's worth it. I mean I'm the only person in the end who can say wether it is worth it but tbh I just wanna rest and not have to constantly fight and fight and fight. And to undo my mistake I will need to fight for a long time and I'm just so tired already. I guess I still have the will to live. I do wanna go to parties, I wanna have fun etc. but I just can't do it, so I'm thinking If I just kill myself the suffering will be over and I won't even care about all of this anymore. That's why I'm thinking this hope I have might be stupid. Especially cause I don't know if it's even possible to achieve what I want to achieve.

 

[pole]

I have struggled with clinging onto hope and wishful thinking for the longest.

have been trying my best to push myself to be led by my brain and logic, not my heart.

I feel pain, heartbreak, disappointment, sadness, when I am led by my heart. situations where your brain is telling you one thing, but your heart another.

at some point, you become exhausted. where has that hope and wishful thinking gotten you this far?

for me, nowhere. and I've made peace with it. set my standards low and just learn to live with not expecting anything from anyone.

 

[AbsurdCapybara]

I'm almost always hopeful. Even if it's a really tiny hope buried deep in my cynical mind. It's all that I have that keeps me going. There are times when I feel abject despair and those are the times my mind goes to dark places. So no, I don't think it's stupid to have hope, it's good. It's good in the sense that there's hope to still live a life worth living which we deserve.

 

[leloyon]

Depends on the situation. For some people here I imagine life could be quite hopeful actually if they just tried to go down the path of recovery, but I see my situation as hopeless and I feel there are plenty of people here who are in the same boat.
I don't know about your life so I can't say.

 

[Arihman]

Do you mean if the chance isn't 100% that is could get better than it is stupid? Like i don't know how high of a chance I have of undoing my big mistake but let's say it's like a 50% chance, I wonder If that's worth it. I mean I'm the only person in the end who can say wether it is worth it but tbh I just wanna rest and not have to constantly fight and fight and fight. And to undo my mistake I will need to fight for a long time and I'm just so tired already. I guess I still have the will to live. I do wanna go to parties, I wanna have fun etc. but I just can't do it, so I'm thinking If I just kill myself the suffering will be over and I won't even care about all of this anymore. That's why I'm thinking this hope I have might be stupid. Especially cause I don't know if it's even possible to achieve what I want to achieve.

No, just that the good must be really worth it, and the chance should be above 50%, unless the cost for trying is low.

That said, it was just my take, if it helps you, go for it, just don't be unreasonable about it, as in thinking you will win the life lottery. But, for example, spending a few dollars once in a while on lottery tickets is not a bad thing, imo.

I do it, from time to time, when it comes to the actual lottery.

 

[Wyldfyre4948]

Hope can be a good thing but it can feel foolish. I hope my wife comes back and we get to work things out. It's probably very unlikely but it would be nice. This way you don't focus on the doom and gloom all the time even if it is overwhelming.

Some small shred of hope is nice to hold onto. My hope makes me feel like maybe I'm not completely gone yet.

 

[ready19]

There are times in my life when I have hope, but then there are moments of immense despair and I don't know which of them is right. I don't know who to believe anymore. Because it's not that I don't want to live, but I don't want to live with this immense mental pain. I've made a huge mistake in life and sometimes I hope I can correct it again and especially undo that mistake, but then I wonder if it's just wishful thinking. Should I try to tell myself to finally stop having hope? Or is there hope for each of us? The

I believe it is human to have hope, to cling to it.

 

[HighFlight]

I don't know what you did, or if it's even possible to undo it. However, I do live with my own past mistakes, which I know cannot be undone. I live with a large degree of guilt. My hope is that I can find away to forgive myself, and make a difference. I will continue to hold on to that hope until I exhausted other options or simply become too old for it to matter.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

I think as the years roll by, and nothing changes for the better, I think it's futile to hold onto hope.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Really, I just see hope as a motivator. It isn't necessarily right or wrong to have it. None of us know the future. I think- if you want things to change then, it's important to have it. I guess- just bear in mind that change and success isn't guaranteed. No matter how much effort you put in. Still- with no effort and no hope to motivate it- then- likely, nothing's going to change.

The main problem is having our hopes crushed. I think that's what makes it feel like we should abandon hope. I guess that's why it's important to have hope but to temper it with reason. You may 'hope' to be accepted for a really good job but- reason has to tell you that you'll likely be in competition with lots of other people. So- I guess it's having enough hope to apply but not so much that you dellude yourself that the job's already yours.

In your circumstances- it sounds like you want to make ammends for something. That sounds like a good thing. It sounds like it would help both you and them. You have to hope that they accept your apology. I guess though, you have to be realistic too though. If your hope is- you want things to go back to how they were- before whatever happened- you probably need to think how realistic this is. Does this person hold grudges? Do they tend to remember and dwell on stuff in the past? Still- you won't know till you try. I hope it works out well. We all make mistakes in life. I suspect the really special friends in life tend to forgive us.

 

[lokabe82]

I think hope is stupid but I don't think its stupid to have hope. Like it's okay to have tickets to a movie even though it's a terrible movie.

 

[KarmicRain]

I've thought about the concept of hope so much that I've naturally come to another question: if it get's "better" will that better be good enough?
like even if things theoretically went perfectly like a scene out of a movie, would that be enough to keep any human being happy?
I don't think it's in our nature to be.
To an extent, I do believe hope exists if the ends are something you can muster enough determination to do something about, but that's if that end goal is something you care enough about. i have a hard time finding the will to care enough to do something about it.
anyway yea things can get better and they can get worse. regardless of your actions, whether or not they'll ever be good enough to make someone satisfied with their life is another story entirely.

 

[ReversedNthTerm]

Hope is meaningless unless you do something with it. For example, hoping for money/a job is stupid if you aren't out there looking for a job or working.

 

[ZoloftSüchtig]

I've thought about the concept of hope so much that I've naturally come to another question: if it get's "better" will that better be good enough?
like even if things theoretically went perfectly like a scene out of a movie, would that be enough to keep any human being happy?
I don't think it's in our nature to be.
To an extent, I do believe hope exists if the ends are something you can muster enough determination to do something about, but that's if that end goal is something you care enough about. i have a hard time finding the will to care enough to do something about it.
anyway yea things can get better and they can get worse. regardless of your actions, whether or not they'll ever be good enough to make someone satisfied with their life is another story entirely.

That's honestly what I've been asking myself as well. Well I know that my "better" will actually be better but is it worth it? After all I've been through can undoing the mistake I made also take away the trauma? Idk. I think I'll probably kill myself randomly, cause when I start thinking is when I start questioning it but if I'd actually do it, it all wouldn't matter anymore anyway. I wish I'd think more with my heart sometimes. Why am I overthinking so much?

Hope is meaningless unless you do something with it. For example, hoping for money/a job is stupid if you aren't out there looking for a job or working.

Im actively trying to undo my mistake but that is a time consuming task and is it worth it if I'm not even sure it's possible to undo the mistake I made to such an extent that I can be happy again?

 

[FuneralCry]

If other people feel in such a way about their own existence then that's fine for them but I find the whole "there is hope for everyone" type thing to be insensitive and absurd, like if someone values their own existence and wants to stay here then that's their own view but it doesn't mean it's everyone's view.

Not everyone even wants to exist here and I could never see existence as being something desirable in the first place, existence itself is the ultimate cause of all suffering after all and I don't understand the people who push the idea of there being hope for everyone in this world where there is unlimited potential to suffer endlessly, nobody can guarantee that they won't end up in a situation of the most extreme torture so to me existing will always be something completely hopeless. It's just a futile process of waiting to decay from age, it's pointless and unnecessary to me, existence was just something I was burdened and it disturbs me the thought of suffering from old age.

So when the idea of "hope" is pushed onto strangers who cannot experience existence in the same way, it's just empty, hollow words, existing just fills me with dread and it's horrible to me the thought of suffering for potentially decades longer.

 

[Unattainable666]

I can only speak for myself. I've lived a long time and experienced a lot in life. At this point in time, I have no hope. I have no expectations. I've lived longer than I should have and am looking forward to ctb. Everyone is different, everyone's story is different. If you have hope then you have life. Good luck to you.

 

[EndJstifiesTheMeans]

In my life hope have only ruined things, like hoping to be loved back or people understand my suicidal thought