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Fish_astronaut

Fish_astronaut

Member
Apr 4, 2019
15
I have been doing trauma-focused therapy for several months now. I am feeling so much less mental and emotional burden and overall feel 'lighter' and could even see myself getting through life by "doing the work", something I was having a hard time even visualizing before.

But the funny thing (to me) is that I am now even more prepared for death. I feel like I got through the turmoil that was weighing my heart down and now I am ready for my reward of eternal rest.

Tldr: I "beat" my trauma, feel better, and I am now ready to sleep forever.
 
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traingirl

traingirl

I was good. I was really good.
Oct 7, 2025
284
This was kind of how doing ketamine felt for me. Everyone makes it out to be the miracle drug for depression but my only insight was being motivated to CTB to solve problems and not being afraid of it.
 
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badatparties

badatparties

Mage
Mar 16, 2025
521
I think this is why a lot of depression pills have a black box warning label for suicide. It can make people feel just good enough to actually kill themselves.
 
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notreallybored

Specialist
Nov 26, 2024
334
I think this is why a lot of depression pills have a black box warning label for suicide. It can make people feel just good enough to actually kill themselves.
ב''ה,

That's actually the rosy "low information" explanation.

A modest fraction of people even 'feel just good enough,' while far more get the mild to moderate akathisia of medication literally selected and proved through the murine forced swim test. So a more accurate description would be 'disinhibited' than feeling good, and with a side of perseveration, so if dysphoria is increased but also it's hitting like a few cups of coffee of anxiety plus restless leg syndrome, let's not redefine 'good' just to pretend the intervention was a particularly bright moment.

The other problem IMHO if anyone is even trying to learn from this is that overshooting the therapeutic amount with SSRIs somehow feels extraordinarily bleak, as is wild to experience or explain and conveniently can be mistaken for the original condition, allowing further billing to further up the dosage, and since for some reason that is not working, allowing further billing for further hospitalization if anyone cares enough about the probably fairly catatonic person by that point and they have insurance to milk.

The 'to excess' experience is in fact quite a lot like the famous David Foster Wallace description, while otherwise 'riding out' the first few days of potential akathisia can get you to the emotional blunting that is kind of better than nothing, except I tell y'all, when you know what 'that's being dosed too high' is, being around folks who just got their dose doubled and are twice as miserable is no fun to be around particularly if they also refuse to have any insight on 'huh, yeah, I was actually less miserable at the level that was working before the dose arbitrarily got doubled because politics had everyone twitchy and doctors used that as an excuse to see if changing things up would make it seem like they were doing something helpful.'
 

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