In my life in general, I would be sad, my heart would be broken, etc. I could get used to anything. but the meaninglessness of life pushes me to ctb.

[paranous]

I've had very bad things in my life, my family left me, I'm a failed person etc. I was saddened by what happened, but I was able to move on with my life. But in recent years, when I face the fact that life is meaningless, every pain I go through feels even more disgusting. doing ctb in my bed feels more peaceful than moving on with my life.

 

[feder]

I feel you, it's like a constant crisis state, when you understand that whatever we do or however happy/sad we get, it ultimately does not matter, since we are all facing the same end.

 

[paranous]

I feel you, it's like a constant crisis state, when you understand that whatever we do or however happy/sad we get, it ultimately does not matter, since we are all facing the same end.

Sometimes something goes right in my life and I keep up with it. But after a while, when I realize how meaningless and illogical what I did, I take a step back. so i can't do anything. i gets stuck in such a cycle.

 

[FuneralCry]

It's just the reality that existence is meaningless and unnecessary suffering, we are only waiting to cease existing where everything will finally be forgotten about, death certainly is the only relief for me and it's understandable wishing for permanent freedom from everything.

 

[Darkover]

there's two choice keep on living or die, either way it's all pointless
in the end every action leads to the same place nothingness