I'm One Resilient Ass Mathafucka

[White_Room293]

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so glad for u not just how things have turned out, but that also you've found a new reliable method should you need it.

Indeed, very painless method apparently. Not my cup of tea lol but yea.

 

[BlessedOffal]

Thanks for the support and kindness. Nice to see someone see my journey for what it is without getting only caught up in the specifics.

And yes welcome to a rare club of people that have a suicide method with no forseeable exit date?

Though I wouldn't describe Ayahuasca as only loving, it can be unforgiving if you have a big ego, but I get your point.

Aww. I feel bad now for not saying more. I got in my head and I was scared to look silly by saying too much. I usually am. But learning about your story, and how you've had a complete turnaround in your life, is encouraging. It's kind of you to share some hopefulness with those of us who might not have decided yet. I don't have a set date either, though I doubt it's terribly far in the future. I'm gathering information and equipment before anything, while also being in treatment. It is nice to know that maybe this is welcomed here as well. Thanks for sharing. And thank you @Centerism, for pointing out the love.

 

[omoidarui]

Indeed, very painless method apparently. Not my cup of tea lol but yea.

wuts ur cup of t

 

[AnnaJaspers]

From the dust of our hardships will arise a new age and a whole new species with new bodies that don't have the problems we have.

The question you should be asking me is am I going to raise my children to be greater than me?

Are you actually serious? Also, how are you going to raise your children if you ctb in the midst of their "development" into "greatness".

 

[Not_Quite_Dead_Yet]

Well I got better around 33 years of age, so 4 years ago. The doctor's found 2 medications that gave my life back.

Is it okay to ask what the two meds were? After an aggregate of 30 years trying different meds, never found one that made the slightest bit of difference. I am glad you found something that helped.

 

[White_Room293]

wuts ur cup of t

SN

 

[GeorgeJL]

Are you actually serious? Also, how are you going to raise your children if you ctb in the midst of their "development" into "greatness".

I don't see myself CTBing anytime soon.

 

[Blackjack]

I overcame many health issues, I beat the almost insurmountable odds against me overcoming anxiety, severe depression, mental illness, hallucinations, being hospitalized several times, depersonalization, derealization, dehydration so bad they had to give me two bags of blood. Weighing only 96 pounds at 6 foot. Being on a liquid diet for years. I use to use a wheelchair and a cane for years. Being physically and mentally abused by my father. Being bullied by other kids throughout grammar school and some of HS. My brother's death at the young age of 35.

Since then I went to college for two years and had a 3.8 GPA which is an A average. Weigh 195 now.

Currently I'm working full time. Working on writing two books. Feel pretty good about where my life is headed. I wanna die when I'm an old man. Currently 37. Will marry a fine Thai lady and have children. I have a painless method ready to use in case my health goes south in the meantime. And when I can't go anymore in life I will make a goodbye thread, play my end of life Spotify playlist. Meditate, take some psychedelics, put on some incense. Then peacefully exit life.

Even though I have experienced the depths of hell I also have experienced the highest ecstasy of my life when I took the psychedelics 2c-b and 4-aco-dmt. I was rolling in sublime bliss for hours. It was a magical mystical experience. Alcohol, Molly, weed didn't even touch the feet of what I experienced that day.

Oh and I'll take out a life insurance policy and wait two years for the sucicde clause to expire before I ctb. Leaving my family millions. How is that for planing and being resilient?

Life can be beautiful in the midst of the storm depending on how you look at it.

Now write about that news media.

Tag @eve2004 @oxymoron @Meretlein
@Centerism
@friendly99

@GeorgeJL you should also post this in Recovery if you haven't already. It's quite inspiring, and I'm basically uninspirable.

 

[Meretlein]

Congrats on overcoming so much. I hope you find what you're looking for in life.

 

[Centerism]

Thanks for the support and kindness. Nice to see someone see my journey for what it is without getting only caught up in the specifics.

And yes welcome to a rare club of people that have a suicide method with no forseeable exit date?

Though I wouldn't describe Ayahuasca as only loving, it can be unforgiving if you have a big ego, but I get your point.

@GeorgeJL

You are more than welcome for any support I can offer you. You're a beautiful person, just like everybody else here today. I wish only positivity in your linguistic existence.

Mother aya to me has never been mean to me. I've taken some pretty heroic doses too. Though, just like any psychedelic, mother aya can become overpowering, overwhelming. If you do have that "big ego" as you described, you would have problems with any psychedelic. Tryptamines, lysergamides and the such are unforgiving spirits.

I honestly don't have a true "point." I just have a position that can't be dissolved in today's society.

I love you @GeorgeJL
You are a great contribution to life.

 

[spanishguy22]

From the creator of the awesome thread "I have proudly assisted 1000 people to kill themselves look at me!"
I wouldnt expect any more quality.

Its a shame I cant ignore your threads or posts now because youre a mod, and a shame they put such an narcissistic, borderline psychopath as one.

By the way, this is a board for suicidal matters, for people actually suffering and interested in ctb, not a board for your self absorbed, deluded rants.

 

[GeorgeJL]

By the way, this is a board for suicidal matters, for people actually suffering and interested in ctb, not a board for your self absorbed, deluded rants.

There I moved it to recovery.

 

[Blackjack]

From the creator of the awesome thread "I have proudly assisted 1000 people to kill themselves look at me!"
I wouldnt expect any more quality.

Its a shame I cant ignore your threads or posts now because youre a mod, and a shame they put such an narcissistic, borderline psychopath as one.

By the way, this is a board for suicidal matters, for people actually suffering and interested in ctb, not a board for your self absorbed, deluded rants.

Don't get yo self banned @spanishguy22 like someone else did for insulting a mod.

You mentioned having children. I can't emphasize enough how selfish that is.

^^All. Of. This.^^

 

[puppy9]

Mr George you inspire me so much. Thank you.

 

[snorli]

Genuinely happy for your recovery. Please don't take this as an insult, but somehow your posts made me incredibly sad. Especially the "fine Thai lady" and kids part, but hey, that's just me ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.

 

[eve2004]

@GeorgeJL :

« From the dust of our hardships will arise a new age and a whole new species with new bodies that don't have the problems we have. »

This is incredibly beautiful. I'm happy for you and thanks for sharing your experience from utter despair to gentle hope for the future.

It makes you wonder if you, the reader of this post, can shed even a few particles of hopelessness at a time, even if you still can't see the light. George is saying the light is there. Most of us can't and maybe will never see it.