I'm going to be honest.....

[Lifeless mindset]

Im sorry to everyone i bullied in middle and high school, I got bullied in elementary school and when I got older and bigger physically, I felt like I had to make myself feel better by making fun of people.
I'm simply a piece of shit.
I'm tired of having to wake up every single day.
I'm tired of letting my past get to me.
I hate myself for all of the fucked up things I have said and done.
I hate myself for taking my anger out on other people.
I hate myself for not being able to finish school and make my dad proud because of how depressed and suicidal I am.
I'm tired of not being able to find any motivation.
I'm tired of being fat.
I'm tired of hearing about politics.
I fucking hate how people just ignore the fact that I constantly want to kill myself.
I hate how I have to go on this forum just to find people who I can actually relate to.
I hate the anger that is built inside me that makes me want to literally commit murder.
I hate the fact that we can't just leave this place in peace.
I hate how racist and fucked up my country is (America)
I hate how my teachers and peers want to see me succeed but my I just don't put in any effort which is just a big fuck you to the people who actually care about me.
I hate how I used to have confidence but now I, not only hate the world, but also hate myself.
I hate when I lose at anything.
I'm someone who always feels like they have to have the last laugh and if I can't then ill usually get physical and beat someone's ass because I can't win a verbal fight.
I'm a piece of shit.
Some of my sexual desires make me want to blow my brains out.
I was raised to not like gay people or Trans but I'm secretly bisexual and my dumb ass still talks shit about the LGBT community because I'm simply a piece of shit.
I'm tired of not being honest with myself or people I talk to.
I hate how whenever I try to accept trans/gay/LGBTQ+ my brain just immediately goes towards hating thoughts.
I'm tired of writing this but I still feel like I just need to let some of this out.
I fucking hate how the girl im closest too is getting fucked all the time and I feel like I can't live up to those guys standards in bed.
I'm tired of not being motivated enough to talk to my family.
I'm tired of questioning my religious beliefs because my parents just had to put me into church when I was little.
I just want to leave this place.
This world isn't for me.
I had a decent life and I just let it go to complete shit.
I can't wait till I kill myself.

 

[FuneralCry]

Living is very painful. There is no escape from ourselves apart from death. This world is also not for me. I wish you the best. When the time comes to leave, I hope you find peace.

 

[Lifeless mindset]

Living is very painful. There is no escape from ourselves apart from death. This world is also not for me. I wish you the best. When the time comes to leave, I hope you find peace.

Thank you. you too.

 

[rationaltake]

Im sorry to everyone i bullied in middle and high school, I got bullied in elementary school and when I got older and bigger physically, I felt like I had to make myself feel better by making fun of people.
I'm simply a piece of shit.
I'm tired of having to wake up every single day.
I'm tired of letting my past get to me.
I hate myself for all of the fucked up things I have said and done.
I hate myself for taking my anger out on other people.
I hate myself for not being able to finish school and make my dad proud because of how depressed and suicidal I am.
I'm tired of not being able to find any motivation.
I'm tired of being fat.
I'm tired of hearing about politics.
I fucking hate how people just ignore the fact that I constantly want to kill myself.
I hate how I have to go on this forum just to find people who I can actually relate to.
I hate the anger that is built inside me that makes me want to literally commit murder.
I hate the fact that we can't just leave this place in peace.
I hate how racist and fucked up my country is (America)
I hate how my teachers and peers want to see me succeed but my I just don't put in any effort which is just a big fuck you to the people who actually care about me.
I hate how I used to have confidence but now I, not only hate the world, but also hate myself.
I hate when I lose at anything.
I'm someone who always feels like they have to have the last laugh and if I can't then ill usually get physical and beat someone's ass because I can't win a verbal fight.
I'm a piece of shit.
Some of my sexual desires make me want to blow my brains out.
I was raised to not like gay people or Trans but I'm secretly bisexual and my dumb ass still talks shit about the LGBT community because I'm simply a piece of shit.
I'm tired of not being honest with myself or people I talk to.
I hate how whenever I try to accept trans/gay/LGBTQ+ my brain just immediately goes towards hating thoughts.
I'm tired of writing this but I still feel like I just need to let some of this out.
I fucking hate how the girl im closest too is getting fucked all the time and I feel like I can't live up to those guys standards in bed.
I'm tired of not being motivated enough to talk to my family.
I'm tired of questioning my religious beliefs because my parents just had to put me into church when I was little.
I just want to leave this place.
This world isn't for me.
I had a decent life and I just let it go to complete shit.
I can't wait till I kill myself.

It takes a lot to be honest. To face things. I hate two awful things I did. I want to ctb.

 

[Snake of Eden]

I have done many things im not proud of. I hurt the people who loved me the most. I turned my younger brother into a narcissist. All that too makes me want to suicide