I'm extremely ugly and I can't take this life anymore.

[tryptamine]

Hello, everyone. I've always been extremely ugly (I've been rated as 0-1/10 online), and my appearance has caused me immense pain and suffering my entire life. Since childhood, I've been relentlessly bullied and harassed, called ugly and other insults every day. In middle and high school, the bullying got even worse. I was physically abused, tortured, had my things stolen or broken, stuff thrown at me, firecrackers shoved in my clothes, and was followed and beaten up on my way home. I used to skip school and pretend to my parents that I was there while I actually walked in the woods, waiting to go home. But then the teachers told my parents I was missing, and they forced me to go to school. My parents never supported me or understood my struggle, they just brushed off everything and told me I needed to go to school and study. This psychological and physical torture went on until I was 16 and finished high school. Now, I've been a NEET for almost four years. I have no hope or future. I can't get even a minimum-wage job because of my looks and I can't support myself. I will never know what it's like to receive anything other than pain and suffering from social interactions. I never had a single friend, no one has ever shown me kindness or appreciation. I'm a hideous monster that needs to be destroyed. I don't belong in this world, anywhere or anyhow. Nowadays, I stay inside my house most of the time, but on the rare occasions I do leave, random strangers on the streets harass and make fun of me unprovoked. People even take pictures and record videos of me, which has happened on numerous occasions. I am so ugly that I don't belong in society. No one would want to talk to me or have anything to do with me. My repulsive face causes disgust to everybody. And all of this is because of something I didn't choose and have no control over. It's very painful to realize that all I can really do is just keep rotting in my house for my entire life. Lately I've been extremely depressed and I can't enjoy any hobbies or activities. All I do is just sleep as much as possible, since sleep is the only escape from my horrible life. Not sure how much longer I can take this.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

Welcome to the forum! I'm sorry you have to go through so much. Life is often so unfair.

 

[patricivselecta]

Welcome!
Hi! I am sorry all that happened you.
You obviously are loveable and deserve to be loved, every human being does.

What comes to my mind:
If you have a hard time making friends face-to-face, maybe consider joining online communities and making friends trough voice chats.
You also could work home office jobs, you can make decent money with that, maybe later on you could robo-advisor to invest or start dropshipping...

However, you don't have to do all this, you have the liberty and right of dying, it is not "giving up", sometimes it is a reasonable choice, but you have to decide.
If you decide to CTB, I'd open to throw you an online farewell party (see my previous post), or if you just wanna talk hmu

May you find peace in fate in this life, or the next.

 

[stupidhuman]

You don't deserve all of this. I hope people who bullied you rot in hell.
People who like to make fun of others are trash.

You don't deserve this.

 

[justwannadip]

Hello, everyone. I've always been extremely ugly (I've been rated as 0-1/10 online), and my appearance has caused me immense pain and suffering my entire life. Since childhood, I've been relentlessly bullied and harassed, called ugly and other insults every day. In middle and high school, the bullying got even worse. I was physically abused, tortured, had my things stolen or broken, stuff thrown at me, firecrackers shoved in my clothes, and was followed and beaten up on my way home. I used to skip school and pretend to my parents that I was there while I actually walked in the woods, waiting to go home. But then the teachers told my parents I was missing, and they forced me to go to school. My parents never supported me or understood my struggle, they just brushed off everything and told me I needed to go to school and study. This psychological and physical torture went on until I was 16 and finished high school. Now, I've been a NEET for almost four years. I have no hope or future. I can't get even a minimum-wage job because of my looks and I can't support myself. I will never know what it's like to receive anything other than pain and suffering from social interactions. I never had a single friend, no one has ever shown me kindness or appreciation. I'm a hideous monster that needs to be destroyed. I don't belong in this world, anywhere or anyhow. Nowadays, I stay inside my house most of the time, but on the rare occasions I do leave, random strangers on the streets harass and make fun of me unprovoked. People even take pictures and record videos of me, which has happened on numerous occasions. I am so ugly that I don't belong in society. No one would want to talk to me or have anything to do with me. My repulsive face causes disgust to everybody. And all of this is because of something I didn't choose and have no control over. It's very painful to realize that all I can really do is just keep rotting in my house for my entire life. Lately I've been extremely depressed and I can't enjoy any hobbies or activities. All I do is just sleep as much as possible, since sleep is the only escape from my horrible life. Not sure how much longer I can take this.

I'm so sorry you went through all of this. For what it's worth, you're welcome here. And if you were here in person I'd give u a big hug. You could hang out with me any day.

 

[KillingPain267]

We humans are a failed species

 

[Marine]

Hello, everyone. I've always been extremely ugly (I've been rated as 0-1/10 online), and my appearance has caused me immense pain and suffering my entire life. Since childhood, I've been relentlessly bullied and harassed, called ugly and other insults every day. In middle and high school, the bullying got even worse. I was physically abused, tortured, had my things stolen or broken, stuff thrown at me, firecrackers shoved in my clothes, and was followed and beaten up on my way home. I used to skip school and pretend to my parents that I was there while I actually walked in the woods, waiting to go home. But then the teachers told my parents I was missing, and they forced me to go to school. My parents never supported me or understood my struggle, they just brushed off everything and told me I needed to go to school and study. This psychological and physical torture went on until I was 16 and finished high school. Now, I've been a NEET for almost four years. I have no hope or future. I can't get even a minimum-wage job because of my looks and I can't support myself. I will never know what it's like to receive anything other than pain and suffering from social interactions. I never had a single friend, no one has ever shown me kindness or appreciation. I'm a hideous monster that needs to be destroyed. I don't belong in this world, anywhere or anyhow. Nowadays, I stay inside my house most of the time, but on the rare occasions I do leave, random strangers on the streets harass and make fun of me unprovoked. People even take pictures and record videos of me, which has happened on numerous occasions. I am so ugly that I don't belong in society. No one would want to talk to me or have anything to do with me. My repulsive face causes disgust to everybody. And all of this is because of something I didn't choose and have no control over. It's very painful to realize that all I can really do is just keep rotting in my house for my entire life. Lately I've been extremely depressed and I can't enjoy any hobbies or activities. All I do is just sleep as much as possible, since sleep is the only escape from my horrible life. Not sure how much longer I can take this.

Hello.

I'm so heartbroken you're also enduring the worst kind of hell. No one deserves anything like this and I wonder how people such as those your are describing are capable of such inhumanity.

I'm still trapped in a similar one even though I haven't given up on fixing myself yet as in my case it should still be possible.

Is plastic surgery or lifestyle changes to become healthier / reduce inflammation not a possibility in your case since I don't know what the cause of your impairment is ?

 

[Tesha]

You have faced some utter shit and unacceptable experiences, and I'm sorry that they brought you here. But they have, and there are many people who will (sadly) be able to empathise with you.

For what it's worth, you come across as someone who has fought all their life and is now tired. Many of us feel the same and that's not a weakness; it's just a sign we're just exhausted.

I hope you find whatever you need here.

 

[axab43]

If anyone has treated you badly because of what you look like, it is because of their crappy personality, not you. Anyone who is decent would see beyond the outward appearance. There must be someone who would treat you decently. Have you spoken to your doctor? There might be help groups for people who have ocd, people used to experiencing emotional pain themselves who would treat you decently You do belong in society as much as anyone else does. If someone doesn't like you, they can give you a break and just leave you alone.

Don't be so hard on yourself and be harder on those others. And you will be accepted here. (I might as well say. I am experiencing alopecia (massive hair loss) due to a lot of bereavement/stress and it is making me feel completely repulsive and to want to hide away as well. It is such a shock after having had a mass of curly hair my whole life. So I understand what pain is about our appearance. You are not alone.