im desperate

[nkfm]

i honestly dont know what i wanna say im just gonna type this out. so like i feel this insane urge to ctb and i cant take it very much longer it just feels so bad. i am having a horrible mental breakdown and i have not slept in almost a full day. i wanna do it so bad but i dont wanna be weak. i try to live but i have nobody and i know i need to stop making excused but i just cant do this anymore. what rules of a world apply to me if im not in it anymore. sorry for spitting a buncha nonsense this post will probably be removed and im really sorry but i have to say this somewhere.

 

[Daft-Bear]

i honestly dont know what i wanna say im just gonna type this out. so like i feel this insane urge to ctb and i cant take it very much longer it just feels so bad. i am having a horrible mental breakdown and i have not slept in almost a full day. i wanna do it so bad but i dont wanna be weak. i try to live but i have nobody and i know i need to stop making excused but i just cant do this anymore. what rules of a world apply to me if im not in it anymore. sorry for spitting a buncha nonsense this post will probably be removed and im really sorry but i have to say this somewhere.

I've been there. Pure isolation and loneliness is a hell that a lot of people haven't had to experience.

When you say you have nobody, what do you mean by that?

 

[90starve]

i know how agonisingly painful it can be to be alone :( wishing you peace OP <3

 

[FuneralCry]

That must be really unbearable what you are going through, existing certainly is torture, it's certainly such a cruel world we exist in where there is no real relief from suffering. But anyway I wish you the best.

 

[nkfm]

I've been there. Pure isolation and loneliness is a hell that a lot of people haven't had to experience.

When you say you have nobody, what do you mean by that?

idk tbh im just in a horrible mental state. I have some of irl friends and even more online ones. but i cant really talk to any of them about my mental health. and for some reason i cant tell my parents either even though they would probably help me. like i just physically cant i dont wanna be more of a disappointment than i already am. ik tthat whole post was generic and ima regret posting it but i had to get it out idk why. and sorry for grammar i havnt slept in a good minute.

 

[LittleJem]

idk tbh im just in a horrible mental state. I have some of irl friends and even more online ones. but i cant really talk to any of them about my mental health. and for some reason i cant tell my parents either even though they would probably help me. like i just physically cant i dont wanna be more of a disappointment than i already am. ik tthat whole post was generic and ima regret posting it but i had to get it out idk why. and sorry for grammar i havnt slept in a good minute.

have you tried seeing a doctor and trying meds OP? That could help you feel better. Don't be scared of asking for help, so many people do need help with their mental health. You are not alone.

 

[Daft-Bear]

idk tbh im just in a horrible mental state. I have some of irl friends and even more online ones. but i cant really talk to any of them about my mental health. and for some reason i cant tell my parents either even though they would probably help me. like i just physically cant i dont wanna be more of a disappointment than i already am. ik tthat whole post was generic and ima regret posting it but i had to get it out idk why. and sorry for grammar i havnt slept in a good minute.

Hey, no worry. Your rant sounds oddly similar to my mood swings (every therapist has told me that I'm reasonable and there isn't a diagnosable disorder which scares me if I'm actually seeing the world clearly). For the most part, I'm fine, but I go through days/weeks/months where I simply can't fathom doing this another year.

You're not alone. If you need to talk you can pm me, or if you've got a PlayStation we could play something. Life's hard enough without feeling alone.

 

[MrDarkness]

Try to get some sleep, your probably tired and mentally tired, my dms are always open if you need to chat. Hope your able to find peace in life or death

 

[crossroads]

Have you tired to take something to help you sleep? Sometimes after that your brain fog clears a bit …

 

[dayofcaveman]

i honestly dont know what i wanna say im just gonna type this out. so like i feel this insane urge to ctb and i cant take it very much longer it just feels so bad. i am having a horrible mental breakdown and i have not slept in almost a full day. i wanna do it so bad but i dont wanna be weak. i try to live but i have nobody and i know i need to stop making excused but i just cant do this anymore. what rules of a world apply to me if im not in it anymore. sorry for spitting a buncha nonsense this post will probably be removed and im really sorry but i have to say this somewhere.

Have you tried running away escape and evasion