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internetslut

Member
Nov 23, 2023
9
I dont even know if i want to ctb. like, it is always on my mind "what would happen if i did? would everything be better? who would be upset? how should i do it if i go through it? am i actually suicidal?" im just not sure. i am scared of death in a way, im scared of losing the one person who does care about me (my boyfriend). am i just not ready? or am i overthinking everything? im never not thinking about ctb, but im also never not thinking about the consequences of it..
 
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RichardFirst

RichardFirst

Specialist
Jan 16, 2021
385
If you are confused about things, then you are probably not ready to CTB. When you've had enough of life, it feels quite clear.
 
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RichardFirst

RichardFirst

Specialist
Jan 16, 2021
385
In other words "If you have to ask the question you're not ready to know the answer" 😏
Something like that :). Don't get a tattoo until you know the design that you want, because it's permanent!
 
Worndown

Worndown

Angelic
Mar 21, 2019
4,183
If you don't mind me asking, what is the reason that keeps you thinking about ctb?
 
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internetslut

Member
Nov 23, 2023
9
If you don't mind me asking, what is the reason that keeps you thinking about ctb?
not entirely sure, sometimes its just a lingering thought that wont go away, even if im relatively happy; other times its because im scared that ill never be good enough for anyone or anything - and also the fact that ive always failed at everything. ctb seems like a peaceful way out of constantly feeling like i dont deserve anything, or to be called a person
 
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hi-okbye

hi-okbye

7.7.2023<3
May 5, 2023
655
not entirely sure, sometimes its just a lingering thought that wont go away, even if im relatively happy; other times its because im scared that ill never be good enough for anyone or anything - and also the fact that ive always failed at everything. ctb seems like a peaceful way out of constantly feeling like i dont deserve anything, or to be called a person
i understand that feeling. i think your suicidality comes more from a place of feeling like you don't belong or don't deserve to belong, you can totally tell me if i'm wrong though.
personally like others said, i don't think you should ctb. there's a lot of things you can do to help your situation and your feeling, i don't think ctb is it.
when your ready to ctb, trust me you'll know. you'll get this feeling all over of just being completly done, with everything. i really hope you don't get to that point ever though. wishing you the best <3
 
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