I recently found my teammate had suicide. This feeling is indescribable to me. I had left him emails about my concerns and also the scenarios for World 3 written for Last Fate, but I had not heard from him in months. Receiving this news left me devastated.
The other half of what was keeping even myself alive too is gone. I could not handle this not even look at it anymore. I just wanted to be able to ask him, 'how did you do it so?' 'The survival instinct, how did you get passed it?'
I need that same courage now myself so I will not have to deal with the pain and shamefulness of a another failed attempt. And, a failed, defunct, cancelled project.
This life, this world, it is not meant for me, personally.
I see that clearly now.
But that is not enough to deter my ability to kill myself. Even impulse will not work. I have nothing even now that impulses me to suicide. That is not a good thing, it is horrible pain.
This pain, it is as sword piercing through the flesh of the steward, in the mind through thoughts, I cannot always feel it physically but I can, in my own mind, the result makes me shed tears, makes my already frail body tender.
Even trying to just clear my head and close my eyes and think the drink as a flavored beverage, mind blocking bitterness I cannot do it.
It is as when I hold the glass, all these memories and voices start playing through my mind as a show-reel.
'Last Fate'
'The immersive, story-driven JRPG told through charming pixel art graphics.'
Everything that was done what could have been experienced just starts flashing rapidly. It will not stop.
If there was something I could take that could numb my mind enough to take SN and pass away I would wish to know.
I do not know how to pass it. I want to die now!! Everything is dead for me.
Why did I bother to live when I knew even then this would happen. Well, I did not know. I could never known 'Last Fate' would soar in the way it did. But, it is just that. Clearly it was only slight recompense for me to see as a way to cushion my inevitable despair.
Perhaps, I could have been friends with him, but I only saw it was a colleague a teammate, that was before he was gone. Now my doubts are also gone.
There is no 'Final Kismet'.
The only 'Last Fate' is death... and certain and doom.
It has already happened now its here to end with me.
Forgive me if I am hard to understand, I have used a translator to help.
The other half of what was keeping even myself alive too is gone. I could not handle this not even look at it anymore. I just wanted to be able to ask him, 'how did you do it so?' 'The survival instinct, how did you get passed it?'
I need that same courage now myself so I will not have to deal with the pain and shamefulness of a another failed attempt. And, a failed, defunct, cancelled project.
This life, this world, it is not meant for me, personally.
I see that clearly now.
But that is not enough to deter my ability to kill myself. Even impulse will not work. I have nothing even now that impulses me to suicide. That is not a good thing, it is horrible pain.
This pain, it is as sword piercing through the flesh of the steward, in the mind through thoughts, I cannot always feel it physically but I can, in my own mind, the result makes me shed tears, makes my already frail body tender.
Even trying to just clear my head and close my eyes and think the drink as a flavored beverage, mind blocking bitterness I cannot do it.
It is as when I hold the glass, all these memories and voices start playing through my mind as a show-reel.
'Last Fate'
'The immersive, story-driven JRPG told through charming pixel art graphics.'
Everything that was done what could have been experienced just starts flashing rapidly. It will not stop.
If there was something I could take that could numb my mind enough to take SN and pass away I would wish to know.
I do not know how to pass it. I want to die now!! Everything is dead for me.
Why did I bother to live when I knew even then this would happen. Well, I did not know. I could never known 'Last Fate' would soar in the way it did. But, it is just that. Clearly it was only slight recompense for me to see as a way to cushion my inevitable despair.
Perhaps, I could have been friends with him, but I only saw it was a colleague a teammate, that was before he was gone. Now my doubts are also gone.
There is no 'Final Kismet'.
The only 'Last Fate' is death... and certain and doom.
It has already happened now its here to end with me.
Forgive me if I am hard to understand, I have used a translator to help.
