I wish i had died when my life was still good aka when i was still a kid

[Canttakeitanymore]

It wouldve been a happy ending

 

[Canttakeitanymore]

I could never imagine i would become such a joke

 

[killedbypsychiatry]

same I wish I had died the day I took the drug that destroyed my life and made my life a nightmare. I just wish I didn't have to be living this.

 

[Black Sky]

Yeah, I sometimes think that if I had died before I hit puberty, it would've been a win. there's something about going on a high note that feels significant.

 

[DarkWolf]

I wish I died at birth would have spared me the pain of everything.
I was miserable, sad, anxious and terrified from the start.

 

[nys]

Same- I wish I died when I was about 10, when I'd just left 5th grade and was so excited for middle school. I was still scared of death back then, so if I died in my sleep, that would be ideal. Compared to now, I was relatively normal back then and my degree of introversion was in the category of shyness, not mental illness like it is now.

I also looked forward to the future so much back then- the only thing I did in my free time was search up colleges and think about what I wanted to be when I grew up. Now I'm scared of the future because I recognize the bad parts too, like the extra responsibility and having to be more mature. As a 10 year old, I usually liked my life and had a lot to look forward to, and if I died back then, I would have had a life consisting of mostly happiness

 

[Ligottian]

Age 8 would have been a good time for me to die peacefully in my sleep. Of course, never having even been conceived would have been better,

 

[FuneralCry]

It would have been the best for me to have died as soon as possible. I envy those who are gone as they are incapable of suffering, to me non existence is ideal as it's the complete absence of pain. If I died at a much younger age it would have prevented so much misery. Staying alive is extremely pointless.

 

[Wilting Daisy]

"You know the nice thing about dying young? You stay perfectly frozen in time. You never have to grow up."

- A Futile and Stupid Gesture

 

[Journeytoletgo]

Me too. I use to be social and popular before puberty then everything went to crap when I developed severe acne. I hung around people that exploited this weakness then when I was vulnerable losing social skills and becoming known as "awkward" I looked like a clown to everyone. It was shyness and isolation throughout HS and socially exhausting to socialize I would get tired easily. Then when I was coerced into sex by an older man I met online the facade fell and I had a mental breakdown going deep into a shell isolated for 4 years then had a fwb that picked up on something being off about me, his dad cornedred me and asked why I wanted to hang around his "bum" son. I look back and think I felt so bad about myself I allowed him in, then another man approached me when I was weak and an alcoholic and I offered him sex. I'm so ashamed I do these things out of loneliness but it doesn't help me. My true issue is being excluded from socializing in HS from the trauma of severe acne and later the trauma of coercive sex at age 21-22. I never had friends during HS they just tolerated me I feel. No one wants to be around you when you have acne really bad and called
Me ugly and tortured me. But I was afraid of being alone I put up with the abuse at times I wish I just had the emotional intelligence to breath a bit and think hey they don't like me fine then. I need to chill and accept it for now and maybe save up money to fix my insecurities and join martial arts. But nope I couldn't think really and didn't have proper tools or guidance.