let.me.let.go87
Meh
- Jul 12, 2024
- 300
On July 6th I stood up to a bully and got pink sheeted. (72 hr hold) but it only lasted 4 hours before I went back to the crisis center. No charges filed. My Miranda rights were never read. I wasn't arrested. No paperwork was given to me. The cops declined to file charges. Today what I assumed was junk mail from lawyers showed up. One had a case number so I started to grow suspicious and decided to attempt to make an account on the government mycase website. When it worked, I began to panic when it pulled up an actual case I did panic when I saw that there is an actual charge that I never received paperwork for or any summons for from the government I went into a full-blown panic attack. My depression is back full force. I was doing great and it's completely fucked. I'm ready to call it quits that fast. I got in trouble in February. The deal was if I didn't get in trouble again for a year the charges will be dropped. In order for me to become a nurse I can't have any charges. Especially violent charges. The charge I had was second-degree assault that will destroy my future. With my depression going away I was looking forward to be a nurse so I could work in the psych field and help other people with depression. Now I feel like I have no hope again. All because some fucking bully told me to kill myself in July and I bucked at him but never touched him and now my future is ruined. I'm done. I don't know what to fucking do anymore. I don't. fucking care anymore. I can't go to jail. I can't fucking do this again. I don't wanna fucking do this anymore. Life is so fucking cruel. . Why was it getting better only just to fall apart in my motherfucking face!? Why!? After all the years of abuse and violence against me, why!? Why not just let things go easy for once? Why!?! God damn it why!?
