Venting I was doing better (antidepressants) until last week for no reason [crashout post lmao]

[intintint]

OMFGGG

I got help a few months ago and took some antidepressants and it actually worked for a while. I wanted to live, went out with ppl, was content, picked back old hobbies!!!
and randomly last week it started to go down, i tried to fight it.

And today the crash out started lmaoooo

i literally want to die again fuck life omg

Like it s crazy in just one week I went from "omg life is so nice im so excited for everything", to "fuck fuck fuck fuck plz god let me not wake up tomorrow"

literally wanna kms everything sucks i dont wanna do anything

I feel so lonely but avoid talking to everyone who tries to talk to me.
I feel so fucking bored so bored and everything is pointless and I dont wanna do anything, on a small scale and on a bigger scale

I am so damaged I will die alone, I can't let ppl in, not truly, I hate myself, I hate being alive, I hate trying, I have no goals, no dreams, all friendships are superficial, fuckkkk


anyways sorry for word vomit im just crashing out so hard and have no outlet.