I am in the same boat as you. I had a low spiral downwards awhile back. It was exasperated by a mental health drug that my Dr prescribed and not actually a psychiatrist, which caused me to act out and friends knew and that made things even worse.
So now that I am just really needing a way to get sn or n to ctb, I wish I could tell a friend. Not so I that can be stopped, but so I could have support and feel less alone as I approach the time to walk through to the otherside.
I love that I found this place to actually not be judged for wanting to find peace in our own way.
I have been really debating if when it is time, and everything is set up and ready, I can phone a friend and have them keep me company before I transition on, but don't want to leave a friend traumatized either.