I want to ctb sooner than intended but when?

[TheFriendlyGh0st]

I intended to ctb on July 5th, 2020 but I think I want to do it sooner than that. Around the beginning of January, optimally. But I'd like some help picking the date. I liked July 5th when someone said "Queer as the 5th of July" to me once, but I have no connection to any day in January so I was looking for some help. I'd prefer not to do it on New Year's so nobody has to associate that holiday with my death, but that's really the only day that I know I won't do it on. Any other day in early-ish January would work just fine but I like to have a specific day to count down to. So... Any suggestions?

 

[AShadowOnMe]

Maybe it's just me, but that's an extremely personal thing to leave up to a forum.

 

[TheFriendlyGh0st]

Maybe it's just me, but that's an extremely personal thing to leave up to a forum.

I dunno. I did have a sort of personal connection to the last date I chose, but it really doesn't matter to me any more. I'm not even sure I'll change the date just yet but I am so hopeless and so alone and I figure any advice is nice I guess. But I don't reach out much and I'm very afraid. Is there a way to delete this thread?

 

[AShadowOnMe]

Hey, if there's a place to talk about it it's here.

I guess for me personally it just hit me that It's Time. I knew my bus schedule was coming soon but never exactly when.

 

[Soul]

The 13th.

 

[Rhea]

Why does a specific date matter to so many people? Like, you'll be dead, why care?

 

[AShadowOnMe]

Why does a specific date matter to so many people? Like, you'll be dead, why care?

I guess there's a certain ritualistic aspect to it.

 

[Subhuman]

You don't have to decide yet, we still have a long ways to go before January. And a lot can change by then. You might not even care about the specific date any more. I know I used to place a great deal of importance on selecting the most meaningful date but the more time goes on the less I care. The only thing I still consider is not wanting to ruin a holiday for others like you said.