Venting I really want to die am planning it out tonight/ body issues

[Sad4Evr]

I do really think I'm fat I don't know if I have bdd but all look in to it thank you for your response also I love your pfp reminds me of that Nyan cat games thing much love

I am about your exact size and the "normal" part of my brain knows that I am not fat and looking at your photo, I wouldnt call you fat in the slightest, We are just not sickly thin. But, I know how you feel because I also have BD. It's a struggle not ever really knowing what your body ACTUALLY looks like.

 

[lukas19]

Since I was 11 years old I have had obsession with losing weight and scared of gaining it. I struggled with my weight alot to the point I had developed an ED I was around 105 pounds at my lowest (I know that's normal to alot of people but to me it was very unhealthy. I struggled with bulimia and anorexia for 2 years. I've been recovered for years now. I've been weight lifting and Chloe ting stuff for years. Had abs for awhile than stopped carrying about abs and focused on cardio. I've never ate unhealthy and not worked out ever in my life. But I recently found out I'm overweight by BMI my BMI is 25-26 I've been told it's not accurate and I do have some muscle. Even if I don't have a double chin or fat on my stomach I do have tons of fat on my thighs and butt.

I am so sad by my weight that it's one of the main reasons I want to CTB before you say "go on a diet" workout or something I've done tons of those and have lost around 20 pounds. I just wish I could be happy with myself I never quit but this BMI thing makes me want to CTB.

I'm very insecure but for this sake I will provide a pic of what my body looks like ( this not NSFW but it's okay if mods want to take it down.

If you've read this far than thanks

Well with your genitics you will never be skinny stick but you have a perfect base for fitness body, build up lean muscle. build up your upper body. 2 years and you would be jaw dropping. took me 5yrs to change from obese to six pack fit body. hard traing and learn nutrition will totally transform your body

 

[PrettyKitty]

I am about your exact size and the "normal" part of my brain knows that I am not fat and looking at your photo, I wouldnt call you fat in the slightest, We are just not sickly thin. But, I know how you feel because I also have BD. It's a struggle not ever really knowing what your body ACTUALLY looks like.

thank you love and I'm sorry you struggle with it too. Your prefect just the way you are.

Well with your genitics you will never be skinny stick but you have a perfect base for fitness body, build up lean muscle. build up your upper body. 2 years and you would be jaw dropping. took me 5yrs to change from obese to six pack fit body. hard traing and learn nutrition will totally transform your body

Your right like I've only been skinny at one point in my life and it was when I was a child. I personally have always worked out my whole life with weights I just personally hate the way I look with big arms so stopped doing it. Right now I'm just doing calorie deflict as well as walking or cardio, so far I've lost around 20 pounds doing that. Thank you for the advice but I'm more looking to lose a bit of muscle and fat than gaining more muscle mostly because I don't like having big legs.

 

[WonderfulWeatherDIE]

Im sorry but you look completely fine. Hella fine. Why is fat on the thighs / butt bad? A lot of guys find that attractive.

Dont want to invalidate your struggle or your issues but thats definetly body dysmorphia. Its in your head. Youre lying to yourself.

 

[PrettyKitty]

Im sorry but you look completely fine. Hella fine. Why is fat on the thighs / butt bad? A lot of guys find that attractive.

Dont want to invalidate your struggle or your issues but thats definetly body dysmorphia. Its in your head. Youre lying to yourself.

You really think so? I keep thinking I'm so fat and ugly I appreciate the comment

 

[LeapOfFaith]

You really think so? I keep thinking I'm so fat and ugly I appreciate the comment

I think you look beautiful. In my eyes there is nothing wrong with your body at all. I would even go as far as saying that you look a lot better than most people. Lots of people would find you attractive, you are neither fat or ugly. You are perfect, I am sorry that you can't see that for yourself for the time being.

 

[huftydumdum]

if it helps, i think you look absolutely beautiful. i know how bad body dysmorphia can get, but for what it's worth you are quite literally the most stunning person i've seen in a while. i wish you the best, whatever you decide to do next. though i do have to say it would be sad if you were to be gone
also, i saw hello kitty in your background. is she a favorite of yours?

 

[PrettyKitty]

if it helps, i think you look absolutely beautiful. i know how bad body dysmorphia can get, but for what it's worth you are quite literally the most stunning person i've seen in a while. i wish you the best, whatever you decide to do next. though i do have to say it would be sad if you were to be gone
also, i saw hello kitty in your background. is she a favorite of yours?

Hellokitty is my comfort

I think you look beautiful. In my eyes there is nothing wrong with your body at all. I would even go as far as saying that you look a lot better than most people. Lots of people would find you attractive, you are neither fat or ugly. You are perfect, I am sorry that you can't see that for yourself for the time being.

Im so happy you said this thank you I hope someday all love myself