I never deserved any of it that happened to me because of autism...

[Sakura.]

Spoiler: ...

Once again I try to help myself by creating such a graphic...

 

[Macedonian1987]

It took me long time to realize this, but I will tell it to you to spare you years of pain. You may think that your physical appearance is repulsive, it's most likely not. It's the autism that repulses people. I don't know why we are so hated by "normal" people. Most of us autists are not bad or dangerous people.

 

[randomuser2348]

It took me long time to realize this, but I will tell it to you to spare you years of pain. You may think that your physical appearance is repulsive, it's most likely not. It's the autism that repulses people. I don't know why we are so hated by "normal" people. Most of us autists are not bad or dangerous people.

Irregardless of what we say or do, at the end of the day autistic people are abominations in the eyes of human nature.

Too functional to be thoroughly pitied, too dysfunctional to be accepted. We cannot be accepted on merit, nor can we be embraced on equity. We're nothing more than social zombies in the eyes of the majority, an uncomfortable and untouchable taboo middle ground.

 

[Hystearical]

Rozumiem

 

[dearlydeparted44]

I feel this on such a deep level.

 

[looking4partner]

It took me long time to realize this, but I will tell it to you to spare you years of pain. You may think that your physical appearance is repulsive, it's most likely not. It's the autism that repulses people. I don't know why we are so hated by "normal" people. Most of us autists are not bad or dangerous people.

If I could trade my looks to be neurotypical, I would. (Not that I'm extremely attractive or something.)

I would rather be accepted and included instead of treated like an annoying idiot whenever I am asking questions to try and understand.

Maybe I would also not have some of the horrible physical and mental problems I developed in midlife that are all more common in neurodivergent people.

I would trade it if it meant not having 24/7 depression and constant repetitive ideation thoughts for years.

It feels like I have them thousands of times a day on a lot of days

 

[insectontrial]

I'm only a little older than you, I'm also autistic, and I relate to your post. I believe suicide is very common in the autistic population. Indeed, it's the main reason I want to CTB.

I was diagnosed young (three) and I always thought, growing up, that I'd outgrow most of my autism and come across as a relatively normal man with a job, wife, kids, and a car. I am unemployed, single, childless, and my autism/dyspraxia means I can't drive.