I need advice :P

[justfloating]

So a while back I told the person I loved that I had been feeling suicidal, at first he was supportive but then he cut me off. When he started talking to me again I was in a circumstantially better place, however that fell through and things became really bad again. I told him I was suicidal again and he was crying and all that stuff. He told me that it made him want to kill himself, kind of insensitive as I know it isn't true. It scared me still, so I told him that if I want to kill myself then nothing he can do will stop me, this is BULLSHIT in my case. My circumstances with him have huge influences on what I want to do.

Anywho, now he uses my saying that as an excuse to fuck off. I had a phone call with him and I was crying my eyes out saying I was going to do it, he told me 'if you want to I can't stop you' and then hung up the phone and continued on with his day. Obviously I didn't do it but only because I decided I wanted to get my ears pierced before I die, and this distracted me long enough for the urge to pass.

I want to explain to him that he can impact where I CTB or not, but I also don't want him to fell the pressures and responsibility of feeling that my life is in his hand.

 

[CuddleHug]

Hi, I'm new here, but have been lurking for a long time, and I know that you can get a lot of support from this community. Talk to us, maybe we can help ease off some of that pain. Is your situation really that impossible to fix? What do you feel has to change for you to keep fighting a bit longer (besides him)?

I have a lot more thoughts about this than I have energy to type out, but I will also hold back a bit because I know you're in a vulnerable state right now. Please don't tell him it's his responsibility to keep you from CTB. Can't you see how hurtful it is? If he was crying when you told him you're suicidal again, I think that's enough of a sign that he still cares about you. Some people can't handle that burden and it's only cruel to put them through that.

I know you want him to know what a big impact he has on your life and emotions, but telling him (or even hinting towards) your life is in his hands isn't going to make him feel better at all. If anything, it will make his distance himself even more because he will be afraid to do anything in case it triggers you to CTB. You'll lose him if you keep that up. You may feel like it is up to him if you live or not, but never put that burden on someone. If his actions dictate what you do, then fine, but what do you think will happen if you do CTB and he feels responsible? He'll live with that regret for the rest of his life, most likely.

Have a hug because it feels like you need it <3

 

[Suicide_vampire]

So a while back I told the person I loved that I had been feeling suicidal, at first he was supportive but then he cut me off. When he started talking to me again I was in a circumstantially better place, however that fell through and things became really bad again. I told him I was suicidal again and he was crying and all that stuff. He told me that it made him want to kill himself, kind of insensitive as I know it isn't true. It scared me still, so I told him that if I want to kill myself then nothing he can do will stop me, this is BULLSHIT in my case. My circumstances with him have huge influences on what I want to do.

Anywho, now he uses my saying that as an excuse to fuck off. I had a phone call with him and I was crying my eyes out saying I was going to do it, he told me 'if you want to I can't stop you' and then hung up the phone and continued on with his day. Obviously I didn't do it but only because I decided I wanted to get my ears pierced before I die, and this distracted me long enough for the urge to pass.

I want to explain to him that he can impact where I CTB or not, but I also don't want him to fell the pressures and responsibility of feeling that my life is in his hand.

Hi there, just read your post and it sounds like your partner (I think it is) is doing something or not doing something in the relationship that is making you unhappy.
Would it not be easier to tell him what you need in order to live.
If you keep threatening to ctb and don't do it, he will see this as an empty threat and you are going to push him away, which sounds the opposite of what you want.
This might sound harsh but I mean it with kindness and support you can't put your choice to live in someone else's hands, it never works out well.
If you want to talk more and explain things more fully but don't want to do it publically, you can pm me if you want.
But you will get all the support you need and people to listen and advise here.

 

[Largeletters]

I think you should, maybe, get the point across, if it will potentially make things better and more right in the relationship.

 

[Lostandfound7]

Hey luv. I echo the sentiments of the other posters here..
My reason for being on this forum was finding out that my husband cheated on me last yr..I was beyond devastated, on top of already being depressed. One night, in a very emotional n the darkest state I have ever been in my life, I told him I was gonna ctb and I meant it..He of course was flabbergasted n cried n begged me to not do that, telling me that he was a "POS AND NOT WORTH MY LIFE"...

If he is the ONLY reason for ur desire to ctb, then I will tell u the same...He's NOT worth YOUR life...I'm here if u need me..plz pm if u need to talk..

 

[justfloating]

Hi, I'm new here, but have been lurking for a long time, and I know that you can get a lot of support from this community. Talk to us, maybe we can help ease off some of that pain. Is your situation really that impossible to fix? What do you feel has to change for you to keep fighting a bit longer (besides him)?

I have a lot more thoughts about this than I have energy to type out, but I will also hold back a bit because I know you're in a vulnerable state right now. Please don't tell him it's his responsibility to keep you from CTB. Can't you see how hurtful it is? If he was crying when you told him you're suicidal again, I think that's enough of a sign that he still cares about you. Some people can't handle that burden and it's only cruel to put them through that.

I know you want him to know what a big impact he has on your life and emotions, but telling him (or even hinting towards) your life is in his hands isn't going to make him feel better at all. If anything, it will make his distance himself even more because he will be afraid to do anything in case it triggers you to CTB. You'll lose him if you keep that up. You may feel like it is up to him if you live or not, but never put that burden on someone. If his actions dictate what you do, then fine, but what do you think will happen if you do CTB and he feels responsible? He'll live with that regret for the rest of his life, most likely.

Have a hug because it feels like you need it <3

im scared that I already have pushed him away, idk what his plans are with me moving forward because he refuses to give me any certainty, adding to my stress.

I don't want him to feel responsibility because I don't want to hurt him like that. But in also need him to realise that when he treats me like shit its not gonna end well, and that when he is there for me as my friend then it makes my situation so much better. I think there a fine line between saying something that will get us close, and saying something that will push him away for good, I just don't know what that line is

Hi there, just read your post and it sounds like your partner (I think it is) is doing something or not doing something in the relationship that is making you unhappy.
Would it not be easier to tell him what you need in order to live.
If you keep threatening to ctb and don't do it, he will see this as an empty threat and you are going to push him away, which sounds the opposite of what you want.
This might sound harsh but I mean it with kindness and support you can't put your choice to live in someone else's hands, it never works out well.
If you want to talk more and explain things more fully but don't want to do it publically, you can pm me if you want.
But you will get all the support you need and people to listen and advise here.

He's actually my ex, I know you may think that I shouldn't be in contact with him but we don't hate each other, we just broke up because he didn't love me anymore. I have tried to explain to him what I need and he hears it but doesn't listen to me, for example he would just tell me to get over stuff and move on to being happy, not understanding its not that easy.

I don't threaten to CTB to him because that is cruel and would do more harm than good, but I will tell him im feeling suicidal urges. I want to explain to him how to be there for me, but at this point im afraid to even tell him when I feel suicidal because I feel like hell cut me off for good if I do again.

Hey luv. I echo the sentiments of the other posters here..
My reason for being on this forum was finding out that my husband cheated on me last yr..I was beyond devastated, on top of already being depressed. One night, in a very emotional n the darkest state I have ever been in my life, I told him I was gonna ctb and I meant it..He of course was flabbergasted n cried n begged me to not do that, telling me that he was a "POS AND NOT WORTH MY LIFE"...

If he is the ONLY reason for ur desire to ctb, then I will tell u the same...He's NOT worth YOUR life...I'm here if u need me..plz pm if u need to talk..

my reasons for wanting to CTB aren't only because of our breakup, but for everything that followed it. I don't have anyone, like I have friends but I feel empty when im with them because they are nothing compared to the people I lost. I was once one of the happiest people, always with a smile on my face, laughing all the time, and I absolutely loved my life. But now that person is a stranger to me, I feel irreparably broken and knowing I will never feel the happiness I once did makes me question if I even want a future.

 

[CuddleHug]

Have you tried telling him how much it means to you when he is there for you as a friend? I think maybe you can also tell him that in those moments when you feel suicidal, you don't have control over your emotions and may say things you don't mean. It is never meant to hurt him, but you understand why he cuts you off when that happens.

It's very hard to give advice like this because I don't know you or him at all, and I can't judge how he will react. Sorry, I wish I had something more useful to tell you.

Hugs~

 

[justfloating]

Have you tried telling him how much it means to you when he is there for you as a friend? I think maybe you can also tell him that in those moments when you feel suicidal, you don't have control over your emotions and may say things you don't mean. It is never meant to hurt him, but you understand why he cuts you off when that happens.

It's very hard to give advice like this because I don't know you or him at all, and I can't judge how he will react. Sorry, I wish I had something more useful to tell you.

Hugs~

yeah that actually quite a good idea tho thanks, hopefully ill get the chance