I keep delaying it :(

[Promortalist_]

This is much more difficult than I expected. I have never attempted suicide before because I didn't have a foolproof method up until now. I am a new member here who recently discovered that ctb'ing is easier and more accessible than they thought. I am so glad that this site exists, otherwise I would've attempted something much more painful and ended up with a permanent disability or brain damage.

Now that I have resources, methods and materials all ready to go, I cannot bring myself to do it. I am ready to leave but irrational fears and anxiety is holding me back. This stupid failing society brainwashes people to believe notions of hell, rebirth, afterlife and other dumb stuff to keep you from dying. The only thing I believe in anymore is nihilism but my anxiety tells me what if these notions are true??? I want to go soon but these intrusive thoughts are giving me so much anxiety.

 

[Journeytoletgo]

This is much more difficult than I expected. I have never attempted suicide before because I didn't have a foolproof method up until now. I am a new member here who recently discovered that ctb'ing is easier and more accessible than they thought. I am so glad that this site exists, otherwise I would've attempted something much more painful and ended up with a permanent disability or brain damage.

Now that I have resources, methods and materials all ready to go, I cannot bring myself to do it. I am ready to leave but irrational fears and anxiety is holding me back. This stupid failing society brainwashes people to believe notions of hell, rebirth, afterlife and other dumb stuff to keep you from dying. The only thing I believe in anymore is nihilism but my anxiety tells me what if these notions are true??? I want to go soon but these intrusive thoughts are giving me so much anxiety.

What are you fearing? What can calm you?

 

[Foreversad]

This used to guilttrip me too .same here .decided to ditch that bullshit and ask my body how it feels .im not a piece of paper born from the ground without consent and free will .im a human .one has to choose about their life.have you decided over what way you will leave the planet?

 

[Promortalist_]

What are you fearing? What can calm you?

What if I am reincarnated or end up in an afterlife that is much worst than here? Honestly reading all the forums on here is calming me down. At least I am not alone, there are alot of people who feel the same way.

 

[Foreversad]

What if I am reincarnated or end up in an afterlife that is much worst than here? Honestly reading all the forums on here is calming me down. At least I am not alone, there are alot of people who feel the same way.

A lot unfair to be in a worst situation .who chosen to be at this situation first of all ? Punishing someon for wanting to let go of punishment?

 

[Journeytoletgo]

What if I am reincarnated or end up in an afterlife that is much worst than here? Honestly reading all the forums on here is calming me down. At least I am not alone, there are alot of people who feel the same way.

I am glad you are reading to calm yourself maybe listen to some peaceful meditation music to calm yourself of these thoughts, these are only thoughts. Know one truly can know honestly what happens.

 

[Promortalist_]

This used to guilttrip me too .same here .decided to ditch that bullshit and ask my body how it feels .im not a piece of paper born from the ground without consent and free will .im a human .one has to choose about their life.have you decided over what way you will leave the planet?

Yeah, you are right. Nobody chose to be here, everyone was forced into this world. Its not our fault and we should not be punished. We are merely the victims in this horrid universe. I decided to try out shallow water blackout because I am able to faint easily. I will update if I do try this method out. If it does not work then SN it is.

 

[Foreversad]

Yeah, you are right. Nobody chose to be here, everyone was forced into this world. Its not our fault and we should not be punished. We are merely the victims in this horrid universe. I decided to try out shallow water blackout because I am able to faint easily. I will update if I do try this method out. If it does not work then SN it is.

I was thinking of it too .the deal is have you found an effective way one is fainting due to hyperventilation and then stays under the water?

 

[Promortalist_]

I was thinking of it too .the deal is have you found an effective way one is fainting due to hyperventilation and then stays under the water?

Not yet :(

 

[filthyrottendirty]

Me too

 

[FuneralCry]

It can be hard to take our own lives, for me it is the survival instinct, we may want to die but as humans we are programmed to live. I do not listen to people who go on about hell, I believe there is simply nothing after this. I wish you well, it can be awful to deal with anxiety.

 

[Worndown]

It is not a race. If the time comes when you are ready, you will go.

 

[ReadyForIt]

What if I am reincarnated or end up in an afterlife that is much worst than here? Honestly reading all the forums on here is calming me down. At least I am not alone, there are alot of people who feel the same way.

Thread 'Your First Day in the Afterlife!!'
https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/your-first-day-in-the-afterlife.63421/

Check out this thread, it talks about how the afterlife doesn't punish those who CTB and it's actually a quite restorative healing experience, far better than the shit we have to go through here on Earth. I am confident that there will be no punishment for CTB. I hope this helps you shed some of your anxiety about what's going to happen after CTB.