i really tried to make the most out of what i was given and it just didn't work. it's borderline evil just to watch someone go through that and just give them vague platitudes. i don't even want to be saved anymore. how disgusting. all of the help i've been offered is tied to how many times I let someone fuck me or how many dishes I wash. i want nothing from these people anymore. i just want to die so badly but it really is 50 percent not wanting to be homeless which feels stupid but i guess it's just America. Nothing matters this message doesn't matter. I have to do it within 2 weeks while I still have a place. I'm not sleeping on the streets after everything I've already went through. Been called entitled so much in my life but I think this impossible world is entitled for expecting me to live in it without asking for help or just fucking crying.
Yes everyone that i ever talked to problems were so worse than mine, that's why they didn't help. Maybe they should CTB too instead of acting like telling their cope stories is going to make me feel better after being threatened to be robbed or my drunk mother beating me and kicking me out on the street as a child with no ID. Oh no your cousin died when you were 6 ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh but you got over it so I should definitely feel like what I'm doing is inferior. I used to love talking to everyone I see. I have no love in my heart. There's nothing left for me here. Fuck this world dude. Fuck everything.
Yes everyone that i ever talked to problems were so worse than mine, that's why they didn't help. Maybe they should CTB too instead of acting like telling their cope stories is going to make me feel better after being threatened to be robbed or my drunk mother beating me and kicking me out on the street as a child with no ID. Oh no your cousin died when you were 6 ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh but you got over it so I should definitely feel like what I'm doing is inferior. I used to love talking to everyone I see. I have no love in my heart. There's nothing left for me here. Fuck this world dude. Fuck everything.
