Ferret77
Member
- Jun 2, 2023
- 89
I don't even know what I want to say, so I guess this will be just rambling.
I feel so alone. Nobody would care if I died. I think most people wouldn't even notice. This past year I've been just living in my room, because my agoraphobia and social anxiety got so bad. The funny thing is, that my mental health seems to be way worse, when I actually socialize and go to social places. I get constant panic and anxiety attacks, and if I just stay in my room or go to places where there's nobody, I seem to be pretty stable in that area. It is very depressing though. I don't have anyone to talk to or anything to live for. I know this is unhealthy, but I don't want to go out there and constantly feel like I'm actually dying over and over again. I just want everything to stop. I feel so numb, but at the same time I feel so much pain, and the only way I feel something real is when I cut myself, but even then I'm aware of how meaningless that is and I just feel like shit after. I just want everything to stop.
I feel so alone. Nobody would care if I died. I think most people wouldn't even notice. This past year I've been just living in my room, because my agoraphobia and social anxiety got so bad. The funny thing is, that my mental health seems to be way worse, when I actually socialize and go to social places. I get constant panic and anxiety attacks, and if I just stay in my room or go to places where there's nobody, I seem to be pretty stable in that area. It is very depressing though. I don't have anyone to talk to or anything to live for. I know this is unhealthy, but I don't want to go out there and constantly feel like I'm actually dying over and over again. I just want everything to stop. I feel so numb, but at the same time I feel so much pain, and the only way I feel something real is when I cut myself, but even then I'm aware of how meaningless that is and I just feel like shit after. I just want everything to stop.
