Venting I just talked to a friend about me wanting to CTB

[guineapiglover8503]

We are both very busy people and they know of my bad depression. I texted them today about some personal updates assuming they wouldn't respond, but they responded right away. We talked for a bit about changes in our lives and their experience at college and then they asked how I was. For the first time in a while, I was honest and said that I wanted to CTB and that I might do it soon and that I know what I would do to CTB (SN), along with me writing a note. They said that they understood and gave me some tips about thinking things through and said that they had a plan too. Whenever I open up even slightly about feeling suicidal, I usually get generic yet patronizing responses, but they instead were very attentive and listened and we both sorta opened up about it. It honestly helped a ton and made me feel a bit better and although we don't talk on a regular basis, they are the closest friend I think I have had and I love them unconditionally.

Lee, if you see this, you are one of the best people I've ever met and thank you for being there for me. Regardless of what happens, I am grateful that you are such a good person to lean on and I can't express how proud of you I am for who you are.

 

[SVEN]

Makes such a difference.

 

[coffeebeany]

We are both very busy people and they know of my bad depression. I texted them today about some personal updates assuming they wouldn't respond, but they responded right away. We talked for a bit about changes in our lives and their experience at college and then they asked how I was. For the first time in a while, I was honest and said that I wanted to CTB and that I might do it soon and that I know what I would do to CTB (SN), along with me writing a note. They said that they understood and gave me some tips about thinking things through and said that they had a plan too. Whenever I open up even slightly about feeling suicidal, I usually get generic yet patronizing responses, but they instead were very attentive and listened and we both sorta opened up about it. It honestly helped a ton and made me feel a bit better and although we don't talk on a regular basis, they are the closest friend I think I have had and I love them unconditionally.

Lee, if you see this, you are one of the best people I've ever met and thank you for being there for me. Regardless of what happens, I am grateful that you are such a good person to lean on and I can't express how proud of you I am for who you are.

I am so happy you could open up to someone and share without shame or judgement. How great that you could be yourself and be met with understanding when you usually have to keep these things hidden.
What a relief. The usual responses can be cruel and demeaning. Personally I don't dare to talk to anyone about this. I am wearing a mask and act like I'm holding it together. Only very recently I have revealed my plans to a person who has been very very close to me for a very long time and seen my suffering first-hand. They were beyond sad but said they could understand. The kindess and compassion have been kind of soothing for me. I could not love this person any more than I do now and I am sad to leave them.

 

[Leyna]

It's usually such a risk to be honest about these things, but I'm glad it worked out for you.

 

[guineapiglover8503]

I am so happy you could open up to someone and share without shame or judgement. How great that you could be yourself and be met with understanding when you usually have to keep these things hidden.
What a relief. The usual responses can be cruel and demeaning. Personally I don't dare to talk to anyone about this. I am wearing a mask and act like I'm holding it together. Only very recently I have revealed my plans to a person who has been very very close to me for a very long time and seen my suffering first-hand. They were beyond sad but said they could understand. The kindess and compassion have been kind of soothing for me. I could not love this person any more than I do now and I am sad to leave them.

Very true and I'm so sorry for the mask you have to put on. I have and still do wear a mask of me being very humorous and happy but inside it's not the same. That mask you keep on can be hard sometimes and it's great you were able to take it off for someone. It is honestly one of the best conversations to have and if you are able, it's something you should do

 

[Throwawaysoul]

you got lucky. Everyone I've brought it up to over reacted and abandoned me.