I have no one

[logar]

For basically my entite life I've had no one to ever have a close, true connection with. Family doesn't really like me all too much, and all of my friends are very surface level, to the point where you could just call them acquaintances. It's probably because I haven't really found the right people, but it's also partly my fault since I'm too afraid to actually be share personal things about myself to anyone, because for me it's incredibly difficult. So I can't talk to anyone about what has been plaguing my mind recently (my suicidal ideation), because again I don't really have a close connection with anyone, but I'm also too scared of something happening to me if they tell anybody else about it. But hey.. that's why I have SaSu! :) (However I still do strongly desire to talk to someone close about it.. even though no one meets that criteria just yet)

 

[baba_yaga64]

Do you have any pets? I know it's not the same as talking to a person but for me being with my animals helps a lot.

 

[logar]

Do you have any pets? I know it's not the same as talking to a person but for me being with my animals helps a lot.

I do have a pet, but he's extremely old and probably going to die soon... I'll be devastated the day that happens.. might just go with him.

 

[coolliontigerragged]

I'm so happy you found a community here on SaSu! Its so wonderful having a place where people understand without going "oh. These people can help!" And then BOOM 5150 psych ward.

What I've personally done to curve this type of feeling is gardening!! I have an apartment with a semi big balcony where I have started planting tomatoes + herbs + more, but honestly indoor gardening on a windowsill is fine too. Its very weird, but it almost gives me some reins to grab onto the harness of life. Even if I am a bit of a mess(attempting to get better but ctb isnt out of the picture), it makes me feel like I have a little bit of control in my life.