Venting i hate being a DID alter sm

[--Dazai]

it's just so fuckfing stressful and weird all the time to be put in a body YEARS younger than you, and they think i'll just accept it?? like srsly. and also bc more ppl are claiming to have DID/be a sys ( not fakeclaiming!! ), less and less ppl are taking it srsly and just end up fake claiming us. it just sucks. and im a jack of all trades, which means i have more than 1 lasting role. but I'm mainly a host and trauma holder. out of all the roles i couldve gotten it had to be that.. i never asked for this. i never asked to form in the first place. i never asked or agreed to be a part of this. sure, ive met a lot of nice ppl and most of our headmates are nice, but i feel like they just see me as a burden and some kind of scapegoat. when something bad happends, its "my fault."

"youve shouldve been there" "you shouldve fronted, its ur job" "you shouldnt have hurt the body like that, now we all have to deal with it" "you shouldve done this" "you need to do that" "you need to do-" and so on and so forth. im just tired. can they see that? so they see how unstable i am all the fucking time? do they see how I can't do simple tasks without falling apart? can they?
and other thing most of our headmates kinda like to do is tease me a little. I'm fine with it!! hell, i'll tease them back. but.. sometimes it feels like they arent joking. like they mean what they say. idk.. it just gets to me so badly.. -

 

[EnvyTangerine]

I can relate to a lot of this.

 

[FuneralCry]

It really does sound so tiring being trapped in that situation, I cannot even imagine what that must be like. The reality is that there could never be anything fair about existing in this cruel world where people have to suffer all through no fault of their own.

 

[Inthewind]

it's just so fuckfing stressful and weird all the time to be put in a body YEARS younger than you, and they think i'll just accept it?? like srsly. and also bc more ppl are claiming to have DID/be a sys ( not fakeclaiming!! ), less and less ppl are taking it srsly and just end up fake claiming us. it just sucks. and im a jack of all trades, which means i have more than 1 lasting role. but I'm mainly a host and trauma holder. out of all the roles i couldve gotten it had to be that.. i never asked for this. i never asked to form in the first place. i never asked or agreed to be a part of this. sure, ive met a lot of nice ppl and most of our headmates are nice, but i feel like they just see me as a burden and some kind of scapegoat. when something bad happends, its "my fault."

"youve shouldve been there" "you shouldve fronted, its ur job" "you shouldnt have hurt the body like that, now we all have to deal with it" "you shouldve done this" "you need to do that" "you need to do-" and so on and so forth. im just tired. can they see that? so they see how unstable i am all the fucking time? do they see how I can't do simple tasks without falling apart? can they?
and other thing most of our headmates kinda like to do is tease me a little. I'm fine with it!! hell, i'll tease them back. but.. sometimes it feels like they arent joking. like they mean what they say. idk.. it just gets to me so badly.. -

Yeah heck, thats aaack. I can see how frustrating it is, may make you want to rebel and not front at all or somethin because they want you there just for your role, i hope they realize your still someone with a backround and experiences and memories. It must be super strange to have a body younger than you in this world and doesnt look likw you most likely. Hope you figure something out

 

[dillydally]

Sorry, what's a DID/sys? What do you mean body years younger than you?

 

[SVEN]

Sorry, what's a DID/sys? What do you mean body years younger than you?

I believe the OP was saying that they suffered from Dissasociated Identity Disorder and that they were the "alt" or "alternate personality" who was host to the other personalities. They identify as being an older personality than the body in which they find themselves.

 

[dillydally]

I believe the OP was saying that they suffered from Dissasociated Identity Disorder and that they were the "alt" or "alternate personality" who was host to the other personalities. They identify as being an older personality than the body in which they find themselves.

Damn, that's crazy, I've never heard of it and can't even imagine it. Poor OP man. Thanks for the clarification

 

[lita-lassi]

if you got diagnosed by one of the same small group of docs that have made a vast majority of "verified" did claims boy have i got news for you