Help i forgot to do my therapist homework and now he is disappointed on me is that normal?

[gggy]

or should i change therapist?

 

[SVEN]

Pretty much the usual in my experience in the UK. They're just like most folk nowadays, overworked with too many clients, too little time, filling in too much paperwork and feeling unappreciated.
Plus they are continually being evaluated and set "attainable" objectives with number of patients seen, results achieved etc. in short it's a high stress job with not a lot of successfull outcomes which tends to lead to disillusionment and burnout.
I doubt changing therapists would help, though I'm speaking from the background of the UK NHS, where we don't get much luxury of choice.

 

[paredler]

It's normal. Sh!t happens, you don't need to change the therapist, you should give it another chance.

 

[JR_Timm]

Ha ha same here, I often forget, or intentionally don't do stuff mine is telling me to do, and after I feel like a kid with no homework done just before school.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

I wouldn't take it too personal!

 

[daley]

I would be worried if he wasn't disappointed.
The homework should be helping you make progress.
By not doing the homework you are delaying that progress.
The therapist wants you to make progress, thus by not doing the homework
he would naturally be disappointed. That is no surprise.

What you didn't say is what specifically did he do when he was disappointed.
Did he shout out at you with his mouth frothing? That might be a red flag.

Did he tell you he was disappointed like a normal person does? That sounds reasonable.
Did it make you feel bad? That's OK. Life is like that - people expect things of you
and you may fail. Do you usually run away when that happens? That might not
be a good way to handle things. That might be a great thing to talk about with
your therapist.

 

[Tommen Baratheon]

or should i change therapist?

Disappointed how? Did he start yelling?

 

[maniac116]

I worked psych for years.
It sounds a bit manipulative but don't think he's doing anything wrong per se

 

[Silent_cries]

Hate to say it, but that's often common with therapists. I've had several tell me while giving me the homework that they wouldn't be dissapointed if I didn't do it, just to give me the most discouraging, uncomfortable look when I didn't do it. Tbh I would reccomend working out a plan with your therapist that'll work out for both of you. Maybe ask if you could have whatever homework he assigns to you adapted to fit your needs and preferances as best as possible? It's better to find a way to make it work out along with your therapist than just not doing the homework from my experience.

 

[depthss]

ive been told by my psychologist that barley anyone does the therapy homework, i wouldnt take it too personally.

 

[daley]

Hate to say it, but that's often common with therapists. I've had several tell me while giving me the homework that they wouldn't be dissapointed if I didn't do it, just to give me the most discouraging, uncomfortable look when I didn't do it. Tbh I would reccomend working out a plan with your therapist that'll work out for both of you. Maybe ask if you could have whatever homework he assigns to you adapted to fit your needs and preferances as best as possible? It's better to find a way to make it work out along with your therapist than just not doing the homework from my experience.

The reason for not doing the homework matters. If you find the homework emotionally challenging that is understandable, but @gggy just forgot.
So this doesn't have much to do with adapting the homework to needs (unless @gggy would like to add more details as to maybe
there is a deeper reason the homework wasn't done).

 

[ladidabi]

Shit happens and you've got too many things to think about. Homework given by your therapist would be the last thing your mind will prioritize.

I lose papers easily, as I'm a person who can not manage paperwork, and always prefer doing everything on the computer. She had known about this for a while because of my issues with hoarding and being unorganized, and suggested it to me last time I told her that I managed to lose the homework (after not bringing it 3 times, and 4 times forgetting to do it)

Me and my psychologist made a deal that I bring my laptop to my next appointment next week, as she made a digital version of the homework as a pdf on a USB stick, that I can convert to a word doc so I can edit it and have it more accessible, and unable to lose it. I am more likely to be next to a laptop than a pen to be fair. Throwing the documents into a folder on my desktop is much easier to deal with than a physical folder that i never place on the same spot of the house.