Venting i find life so confusing

[Oogie]

'I am more and more losing contact with my environment and with myself. Instead of taking an interest in what goes on and caring about what happens with my illness, I am all the time losing my emotional contact with everything including myself. What remains is only an abstract knowledge of what goes on around me and of the internal happenings in myself… Even this illness which pierces to the centre of my whole life I can regard only objectively. But, on rare occasions, I am overwhelmed with the sudden realisation of the ghastly destruction that is caused by this creeping uncanny disease that I have fallen a victim to… My despair sometimes floods over myself more in the disease, I sink into an almost oblivious existence. My fate when I reflect upon it is the most horrible one can conceive of. I cannot picture anything more frightful than for a well-endowed cultivated human being to live through his own gradual deterioration fully aware of it all the time. But that is what is happening to me'

 

[whatevs]

'Tis a quote from somewhere?

 

[FuneralCry]

Existing really is so horrifying and to me it is terrifying that there is no limit as to how bad things can get. Life really is so cruel and it seems as though there is no escape from suffering. This is why the thought of non existence brings me so much comfort, as in death nothing can hurt us and it is the end of this unnecessary struggle.

 

[budgie]

You just described the last 2 years of my life... Really couldn't have said it better myself.

 

[its-about-time]

Not caring at all has kept me pretty euphoric these last couple months but all the sudden it's crashing down and I am so disgusted by being alive and just want it to be over. Whatever you quoted is very relatable.

 

[Cathy Ames]

'Tis a quote from somewhere?

I can't find the original source, but it was written by an 18-year-old who had been diagnosed with schizophrenia, and other books and writings are quoting it.

I can't find the original source, but it was written by an 18-year-old who had been diagnosed with schizophrenia, and other books and writings are quoting it.

Here is one example...

Dissonances of the Mind

In psychotherapy and psychiatry, mental illness diagnostics is limited to the description of symptoms and has nothing to do with assessing the state of the organ that performs the mental functions. In other branches of medicine, any diagnosis aims to answer the question about the physical...

books.google.com